One Of These Things Is Not Like The Others

There are a couple of reasons for this title which will become clear in due time, but for the moment, let's just bask in the return of Big Brother – the horribly mutated version for North America. It's true, this is not the show that John de Mol created and which the rest of the world watches and participates in by calling in and voting for who should be evicted and who should stay. CBS tried that in the summer of 2000, and I think it's fair to say that if that were the only example of a reality show that was on the air that year the genre might have died "a-borning." But there was a little show called Survivor – which I'm convinced that no one at either Endemol or CBS thought was going to take off the way it did – that kicked Big Brother in the balls and took its lunch money. And when Big Brother came back for its second season it had ceased to be a show where the audience was an active participant and became a somewhat weak Survivor clone, but one which holds an audience.

This season the Big Brother house has been done over in a sort of Alice in Wonderland – or probably more accurately an Alice Through The Looking Glass – motif complete with one bedroom where everything is oversized and one is undersized (to say the least). And there was one room where the beds were round for no apparent reason, although I'm sure we'll discover one eventually. The eleven house guests were let into the house in groups of four, three, and four. Yes, I did say eleven, which is down from last year, but that's part of The Twist for this season (or one of the twists anyway). Naturally the "randomly chosen" first four – Carol, Joe, Mike and Amber (not that one) – grab the big beds, while the second three – Nick, Danielle, and Jameka (this season's only African American player, who admits that she doesn't spend much time with White People and is rather nervous about it) have far reduced choices. The final four – Kail, Jen, Eric and Zach – just happens to include some of the tallest members of the cast get the "Hobbit Hole" room with the tiny bed and the low to the floor door.

Once the players have their beds selected they get together in the living room to introduce themselves and it's a chance for us to get a really good look at them. The oldest one – so far – is 38 year old Kail while the youngest at "not quite 21" is blonde Danielle. In fact this is probably the youngest group of houseguests ever since – of the ones we know about – the only other one out of his twenties is graphic designer Zach. There's the usual sort of bitchy but insubstantial comments that occur. One houseguest states in confessional that she doesn't think another woman is "a person of substance" because of her enormous giant boobs." Don't snicker; from such facile observations are alliances forged on this show. The big early revelation is that Joe is Gay (no shock there). Actually he says that he works as a receptionist in a children's hair salon which is about the least "butch" job one can think of and yet another example of Big Brother casting the most stereotypical Gay people in America. Kail (who owns multiple businesses and is willing to tell us all about how most of her small Oregon town works for her or her family, but has only told her fellow houseguests that she was "just" a real estate agent) came off as something of a homophobe when she said in confessional that she would be "heartbroken" of one of her children "chose a Gay lifestyle." Which is a pretty crappy thing to say, but there's a bit of a hitch because we don't know when these confessionals were shot, and there are revelations to come about our happy little Gay guy.

The revelations are going to come because of the first Twist of the season. Host Julie Chen shows up on the living room monitor and tells the denizens of the minimum security prison known as the Big Brother House that they are not the only houseguests in the building. They are three people that they know; possibly a rival, an enemy or someone they have unfinished business with. And they're watching the action in the living room on TV. The three are Joe's ex, Dustin, "Evil" Dick (he insists on calling himself "Evil") who is Danielle's estranged father, and Jessica who is owed $5 by Carol from back when they were in high school. Huh!? Back downstairs the main group of inmates is speculating on who from their past life could be upstairs. Joe almost immediately says it has to be Dustin, and claims that Dustin gave him gonorrhoea (Dustin says it was Joe who was cheating and gave him The Clap), and that after they broke up Joe turned all of Dustin's friends against him. If Kail's comments about the Gay Lifestyle came after hearing this, they may seem just a bit less homophobic. Or maybe not. Suffice it to say that "our happy little Gay guy" doesn't come off at all well even without a rebuttal from Dustin. Danielle is afraid that it's probably her dad but doesn't say anything, while Kail is mostly worried that someone from her hometown will reveal the fact that she is – say it with me folks – a multiple business owner. As for Carol, she can't figure out who from her life could be somewhere in the house except maybe one of the girls she dissed when she was in high school.

The HOH competition was a bog standard one with a bit of a spin added to it – so to speak. Players paired up (with one not getting a partner and thus not competing) and while one player sat on a giant mushroom (like the Cheshire Cat in Alice in Wonderland – remember that part of the theme) while their partner answered questions based on what the houseguest said in a general questionnaire before the start of the show. For every incorrect answer the mushroom of the "answerer's" partner would spin faster. Eric, who was trying desperately to answer questions wrong, ended up winning the challenge with his partner Kail who stuck to the mushroom like glue. Then Julie announced that the Head of Household would be chosen by the three players we haven't met yet. They decided to give it to Kail. Then, after everyone cleaned up (there were geysers of mud and a cloud of powdery white dust for the mushroom riders), the three players upstairs came down to meet everybody else. Pointedly Joe refused to shake hands with Dustin, but clearly the most emotional situation related to the massively tattooed "Evil" Dick and his daughter who fled to the bathroom along with most of the women on the show. I suspect that while Dustin & Joe is the relationship with the most external conflict, whatever happened between Dick and Danielle goes a lot deeper.

Ah, but there's one more complication thrown into the mix for this season and it's The Big Twist. Throughout the show they had been teasing us with the idea that one houseguest would be ours (the audience's) to control. At the end of the episode it is finally revealed that the one to be controlled would be Eric, who had been Kail's partner in the HOH competition. At the end of each episode viewers will be polled as to what "we" want Eric to do in a given situation ranging from how we want him to vote during the eliminations to which woman (I think/hope it's only women) he should start a "showmance" with. He's our little puppet to master. And while It's not the same as being able to vote out houseguests ourselves as is done in other shows in the Big Brother worldwide franchise, it is a lot more interactivity than has been available in the past. Despite the fact that he seems like the other players Eric is most assuredly not like the others.

The Big Brother houseguests are in their seventh day in the Big House. It is possible to get the live Internet feeds on Real Networks, but for the first time ever there is a daily three hour show available on the American cable network Showtime Too called Big Brother After Dark which shows viewers what's going on, live, in the Big Brother house from Midnight to 3 a.m. Eastern which is 9 p.m. to Midnight in California where the house is located – according to producer Allison Grodner, "That's primetime for the Big Brother house. It's when our houseguests are most wide awake and having fun, talking about strategy and playing the game. People are going to see quite a bit." And since it's on cable it won't be as censored as the broadcast programming is. Unfortunately that option isn't available in Canada. Global, which broadcasts Big Brother in Canada is offering an interactive contest called "In The House" where players can answer questions on their computers as each episode progresses. The highest point total for the week wins a TV with the highest point total for the year winning tickets to the show's wrap party. It's all part of an effort to make Big Brother 8 a more involving experience for the viewers at home. (Of course if you can't be bothered with the internet live feeds and aren't willing to subscribe to Showtime Too there's always Jackie's blog The (TV) Show Must Go On where she makes a heroic effort to summarize what's going on in the house, complete with her patented eyerolls @@. She has also posted the names of some other sites that recap the live feeds.)

Big Brother is the height of mindless summertime programming, the sort of thing that has little significance and not much in the way of dramatic qualities. The "characters" aren't particularly compelling and the casting – this year in particular – has tended to focus on the young and insubstantial rather than people who have accomplished something in their lives as some previous seasons have had. Purely on the level of the three episodes a week that most people see it can be dismissed as a typical reality show. Dimension is added however by the ability to see material other than what the show's producers edit for mainstream consumption – the live feeds and now Big Brother After Dark – which gives an enhanced view of what is occurring in the house. Because it's live it represents a more candid view of the people in the house. It's still "reality TV" but it's "reality" as it happens rather than interpreted by producers and editors looking to create artificial conflict and dramatic storylines. Where the series is finally making a breakthrough is in terms of interactivity. By giving the viewers a player to "control," even to the limited degree that we will be able to make decisions for him; the producers have made a big step. Having Eric "controlled" by the viewers breaks down the fourth wall from our side, making those who vote on what he should do participants rather than just observers. It's a small step, but more than the baby steps of other audience participation shows like American Idol in making TV interactive. And if you don't think this is significant consider something the Dianne Krisitine posted in Blogcritics. The article titled TV Yearns to Let You Choose Your Own Adventure states that new NBC Entertainment boss Ben Silverman wants to develop dramatic series along the lines of "choose your own adventure books" where decisions made by readers – or in the case of TV, viewers – influence the direction in which the story goes leading eventually to different endings. Indeed Chuck Lorre proposed a primitive version of this to FOX in 2001 with a show called Nathan's Choice where viewers would vote during a commercial break as to which of two options the lead character would take and then air the second act of the episode based on the viewers vote. With the "America's Player" idea, in which some of Eric's actions are controlled by the players, we are seeing this idea in action, although admittedly not in the format that either Silverman or Lorre envisioned. It'll to be interesting to see how this is going to work.

Short Takes – July 5, 2007

Summertime, and the livin' is easy. Well not noticeably so but you know how it is. My mother got back from Vancouver (bringing my nephew back to his mother) after spending a week with my brother, his fiancé and her son and parents. She said that Greg sent something back for me with her – it turned out to be my tax information (he did them for me because I didn't have a printer until after the income tax season ended). The weird thing was that not only wasn't I disappointed, it was way more than I expected.

A belated Happy Fourth of July to my American readers – well USAian, since Canadians and Mexicans and everyone else south of the Rio Grande are also "Americans" but you get my drift. As usual, I watched 1776 rather than the totally botched presentation of the Boston Pops 4^th of July concert that CBS will be putting on. I loved it on A&E but when they moved it to CBS the quality of all three went way down. I had planned to get this out sooner but stuff kept getting in the way. Not that there's much to report beyond the usual PTC stuff but let's try.

Washington week in review: Isaiah Washington continues to try to apportion blame for his no longer being on Grey's Anatomy. You may recall that he first blamed ABC for firing him after he had done everything (and more) that the network told him he needed to do to stay on the show. The words "law suit" were even uttered. Then he blamed the media – always a favourite for actors and embattled politicians. Next he blamed T.R. Knight, or at least said that Knight should have been fired instead of him. Apparently (and no I don't get this line of reasoning) Knight should have been let go because he was offended by Washington's use of the derogatory term, and because he was angling for a raise. Most recently Washington has decided to blame Grey's Anatomy star Patrick Dempsey. He told Larry King that he got into the infamous fight with Dempsey after Dempsey wanted to delay shooting a scene until Ellen Pompeo arrived on set. Washington told Dempsey that he didn't need Pompeo and "I can act," which supposedly sent Dempsey into another zone. "He became unhinged, sprayed spittle in my face. I'm asking him why is he screaming at me. ... He just becomes irate." He says he used "the word" not as a homophobic slur but that it "implied 'somebody who is being weak.'" – presumably Dempsey. So far Washington hasn't blamed any of the female members of the Grey's Anatomy cast. Nor has he put the blame on the person who really deserves it – the man in the mirror. The whole matter would have blown over if Washington hadn't made the incredibly stupid decision to deny using "the word" by actually using "the word". Isaiah Washington needs to "ferment son bouche" stop digging a deeper hole for himself before he ends up doing dinner theatre in Arkansas.

Casting news: Dana Delaney will apparently be cast as Bree's "long lost sister," a passive-aggressive conservative Republican woman who used to live in the neighbourhood and is married to a much younger man. Reportedly the producers are looking at Nathan Fillion, the 36 year-old Canadian actor who starred in Firefly and Miss Match to play the 51 year-old Delaney's husband. Fillion most recently starred in Drive and may be getting a reputation as the new Ted McGinley for the number of series he's been in that died quick unnoticed deaths but remember, Firefly and Drive were on FOX while Miss Match was produced by 20^th Century Fox. Maybe Fillion just has to keep away from projects associated in any way with Rupert Murdoch.

Recasting news: Also known as "the pilot was sold, now let's get rid of the cast who were in it." I'm not sure how much of this is a result of Newtork weasels sticking their snouts into projects that have been already sold but it seems that after pilots are sold there comes a sudden spate of recasting which leads to people who worked well in the pilot being replaced for no apparent reason. Just consider the following:

• Marrin Dungey, who played Dr. Naomi Barrett in the backdoor pilot of Private Practice is out; Broadway actress Audra McDonald in.
  
• Brett Cullen (Governor Ray Sullivan in The West Wing), who played the father in the pilot of The CW's Life Is Wild is out; D.W. Moffett from Hidden Palms and For Your Love in, playing the father.
  
• Mae Whitman (Ann Veal on Arrested Development) out as Becca Sommers on Bionic Woman out; no replacement announced but the character will no longer be deaf.
  
• Amber Valetta out as Coraline in Moonlight; Shannyn Sossamon (Kira on Dirt) in.
  
• Shannon Lucio (Lindsay in The O.C.) out as Beth in Moonlight; Sophia Myles in.
  
• Rade Serbedzija (Dmitri Gredenko on 24 this season) out as Josef, Jason Dohring (Logan from Veronica Mars) in.
  

At least two of the cast changes on Moonlight relate to the arrival of former Buffy The Vampire Slayer and Angel producer David Greenwalt as Executive Producer/Showrunner. The replacement of Serbedzija with Dohring is particularly jarring since Serbedzija is an older Eastern European type guy and Dohring is – you know – neither of those things. I suppose that making Josef a "young, mischievous hedge-fund trader" rather than an old-school vampire who is mentoring the lead character in an uneasy alliance is meant to attract a hip young audience as well as being in keeping with the notion that vampires don't age, but for me there's something to the notion of having someone who looks and sounds as if he could have been best buds with Vlad the Impaler acting as the lead character's mentor rather than some guy who looks like he should be going to Grad School regardless of how long ago he went through the change. I also don't get what the reasoning could be behind changing the Becca character on Bionic Woman from deaf to hearing, since none is given. Is it because deaf people aren't supposed to be attractive, or audiences can't relate to the deaf? Which is obviously why I am neither a Network Executive or a Showrunner

Who does the PTC hate this week?: Well obviously they hate TV violence, so it's no surprise that PTC President Tim Winter was at the Senate Commerce Committee hearings on Violence on Television talking up the organization's position on the badness of violence on TV. He cited the PTC's study which claimed that e TV season which concluded last year was the "most violent that the PTC has ever recorded – averaging 4.41 instances of violence per hour, every hour, during prime time, or one instance every 13½ minutes – an increase of 75% since the 1998 television season." A little later we'll see just how restrictive the PTC's definition of violence is, but first let's look at the trends that the PTC is seeing. Winter told the Committee, "In addition to the marked increase in the quantity of violence, we are seeing several other disturbing trends. First, the depictions of violence have become far more graphic and more realistic than ever before, thanks in part to enhanced computer graphics employed in television production today. Second, there is an alarming trend for violent scenes to include a sexual element. Rapists, sexual predators and fetishists appear with increasing frequency on prime time programs. Third, we are now seeing the main character – the protagonist the audience is supposed to identify with – as the perpetrator of the most violent acts. And lastly we are seeing more children being depicted as the victims of violence." Which is worrying if taken entirely at face value but I'm not entirely convinced that you can. The appearance of "rapists, sexual predators and fetishists" does not necessarily mean the actual depiction of their activities, and certainly not in graphic detail. The PTC cited a number of examples including episodes of NCIS and CSI. They also cited two FX cable shows – The Shield and Nip/Tuck – for special recognition, even though both shows are scheduled for times later than those when the PTC's supposed concern – children – would normally be watching. But of course the PTC has long ago ceased to be truly concerned with protecting the children and is actually focussed on deciding what everyone should be allowed to watch regardless of age or the time that the show appears.

Of course what would a Winter appearance before any governmental hearing (and TV camera) be without touching on certain favourite topics that are not directly related to TV violence. These include the Second Circuit Court decision and the Janet Jackson incident – "After the Janet Jackson incident, television executives were quick to come before the Congress to pledge zero-tolerance for indecency. Subsequently they filed a federal lawsuit which would allow them to use the F-word at any time of the day, even in front of millions of children. Sadly they managed to find two judges in New York City who agreed with them. And now the networks are in Court again, this time saying that the Janet Jackson incident was not indecent." – the V-Chip – "recall that when the V-Chip was introduced the television industry denounced it as censorial heresy. That is, they denounced it until they found a way to manipulate what was supposed to be a simple solution for parents. Instead the industry turned the V-Chip into a means for even more graphic content while using it as an excuse to violate the broadcast decency law." – and the industry's efforts to educate people on the V-Chip – "Through efforts like the 'TV Boss' campaign, the industry promised you hundreds of millions of dollars to educate parents on content-blocking technologies, yet all objective data shows that parents still have no constructive grasp over the TV ratings system or the technologies that are reliant upon them." – and cable choice - "And Senators, if you subscribe to a cable or satellite service, you are forced to pay almost $9.00 every year to the FX network so they can produce and air this kind of material. And with tens of millions of Americans forced into the industry's bundling scheme, FX reaps hundreds of millions of dollars each year to produce this material, and that is before they sell even one TV commercial." All of these – with the possible exception of the cable choice issue, although I do wonder how much of the $9 subscription fee for F/X the network actually gets – are examples of the PTC manipulating facts to fit their thesis and using dubious surveying techniques as with their survey "proving" that efforts to educate parents on the V-Chip don't work which was included in a general survey not specifically aimed at parents.

Still what I find most amazing is that the PTC wants this to be a one way street where they can complain without contradiction but any effort by the TV industry to defend themselves either must be barred or is regarded as an act of evil-doers: "As troubling as those content examples are, Mr. Chairman, I am equally dismayed by the seeming contempt the industry has for anyone who would suggest reasonable self-restraint. Recently the CEO of Time-Warner decried this hearing, likening your concerns to Nazi Germany." This is interesting since surely any action that the Senate Committee would require of the networks would not be "self-restraint" but rather legislatively imposed restraint in the form of increased regulation of content. And then there's this: "Every time the public – and our public servants – call for more responsible behavior, the industry refuses to have a meaningful dialog or offer real solutions. Rather than coming before you to address the negative impact their products have on children, they turn the conversation into a lecture on broadcast standards and the Constitution. Rather than acknowledging the scientific evidence manifested in over a thousand medical and clinical studies, they underwrite their own research and point to its differing conclusion. And rather than focusing on their statutory public interest requirements for using the public airwaves, they shift the conversation to entertainment in general and invoke the always-sobering term, 'chilling effect.' But I wonder how 'chilling' things really are if, as we've read in the press, the Fox broadcast network airs a program this fall where an amorous monkey joins a man and woman in a sexual encounter." Because of course the PTC doesn't seem to believe that the protections of the Constitution of the United States extends to Television industry – their attitude on the appeal of the "fleeting obscenity" case came perilously close to saying that the industry should not be allowed to appeal the FCC decision and that the networks were not eligible for the constitutionally guaranteed right of appeal.

In fact although many members of the committee supported increased regulation there are genuine concerns with regards to First Amendment rights. Broadcast and Cable stated that the concerns were bipartisan. Both Ted Stevens (R – AK) and John Sununu (R – NH) raised the issue According to Broadcast & Cable Sununu "said that as 'bothered or disappointed' as he and his colleagues might be by what they see on TV, 'it is very difficult to solve or address with a rule, regulation or law....' Anytime you address the quality, form or content [of programming], he said, 'you run into genuine, important First Amendment questions.'" Broadcast & Cable also reported that Senator Frank Lautenberg (D – NJ) "was concerned about violence, but placed it in a wider context. While he said that TV programming was often vulgar and discouraging and opined of the 'depravity' ruling our behavior, he said regulating that behavior didn't work. 'We tried it once,' he said. 'It was called prohibition.' The key, he said, is finding out how to curb the appetite for such programming--check with the hotels and see what kind of movies people most download, he said – while not violating speech freedoms."

Which brings us to the PTC's Cable Worst of the Week which directly ties into what exactly the PTC counts as "violent content". The show is The Closer which the organization actually praises in the first paragraph of their review. However after that it turns into an attack on the content of the premiere episode. "Unfortunately The Closer's June 18^th season premiere injected unneeded and disturbing graphic violence into a mystery about a murdered family. In the episode's opening, the camera focuses on the dead body of Jenny Anne Wallace, a murdered twelve-year-old. Bloodied stab wounds cover the girl's body. And, to eliminate any doubt about the brutality of the crime, Brenda crouches down and points out: 'There are three visible wounds: one in the back, one in the chest, and one in the throat.'" But of course we aren't seeing "graphic violence," we are seeing the aftermath of violence which isn't shown on screen. The PTC adds "Scenes and descriptions of murder on a show about homicide detectives are to be expected. But there is nothing to be gained in airing the grisly details of a child's murder." In fact there is and it is shown in the clip that the PTC uses to illustrate the "graphic violence" because the characters' reactions reveal something of them. Lt. Provenza (played by Anthony Dennison) is visibly disgusted by the scene and attempts to block the documentary camera shooting the scene. In previous episodes, Provenza has been seen as a callous hard-ass and showing his reaction humanizes him a bit. Brenda's clinical detachment as she examines the body is likewise in keeping with her character. She is reacting on a professional level even though that she will be passionate in her efforts to bring the killer to justice no matter what.

By way of contrast, the show that the PTC labels as the Best of the Week was, amazingly, the finale of ABC's Fast Cars and Superstars, a show in which "celebrities" drive stock cars in a series of racing challenges. I won't go through the description of what the PTC loved about the show – it was more in the way of an episode recap done as breathlessly as is possible on a computer screen or printed page. What was particularly laughable however was the final paragraph: "Fast Cars and Superstars was a huge success. It provided high-intensity, entertaining television that people of any age could appreciate and enjoy." Which of course is why it garnered huge ratings during its run and the admiration of all the TV critics. Oh wait. The critics who bothered to review the show loathed it and the viewers who are supposedly craving this sort of "high-intensity, entertaining television that people of any age could appreciate and enjoy" stayed away in droves. After the series debut, which drew 5.5 million viewers, subsequent episodes lost viewers with the finale drawing 2.15 million viewers and finishing fifth, behind reruns of Reba. This goes to show how out of touch the PTC is with the tastes of the American public. They don't want to see drek like Fast Cars and Superstars and do want quality programming like The Closer or entertaining programming like Hell's Kitchen.

Happy Canada Day! (2)

It's Canada Day, and we all know what that means! Okay, so most of you don't because you're handicapped by being, you know, Americans and all. July the First is the day that we as Canadians celebrate going from being a group of four colonies to something that was more than a colony and less than a nation – a Dominion. It took the Statute of Westminster of 1931, almost 64 years after the unification of the colonies to make the Dominions equal to the United Kingdom legislatively. Up until that time Acts of the British Parliament would extend to the Dominions and the laws of the Dominions could be overturned if they were deemed "repugnant to the law of England." Of course, most Canadians don't see this as an important change, although it meant that Canada declared war on Germany in 1939 on our own rather than as part of the British Empire as we had in 1914. We celebrate the birth of our nation as having happened on July 1, 1867.

Of course since this is a TV blog I need some sort of hook to tie Canada Day to TV. Last year, when I posted the picture of the Fathers of Confederation, someone asked "Okay, so that's the cast of characters. Now who plays them on TV?" (Okay, it was my buddy Tele-Toby.) Well that's not too easy. As far as I can tell there's never been a TV show, movie or mini-series that details the story of the founding of Canada as a united country – in other words no Canadian answer to 1776. Back in the 1950s the National Film Board did some dramatizations of great people in Canadian history and focused a lot of time and energy on the period between 1840 and 1867. They were Social Studies class staples when I was a kid.

On the other hand, Canadian Prime Ministers are a surprisingly rich vein to be mined. There haven't been that many more shows about Canadian Prime Ministers there are enough, and they seem to be timed in such a way that most of the 140 years of Canadian history is covered without having to reference The Royal Canadian Air Farce and This Hour Has 22 Minutes too much until you hit the modern period. I have a list of Prime Ministers and who played them, although sadly I don't have images of the actors in the roles to go with the list. None of them seems to be available online.

Sir John A Macdonald (1867-1873, 1878-1891): The first Prime Minister is the probably the first Canadian Prime Minister to be depicted in a dramatic work. American character actor Frank McGlynn portrayed him in the British movie The Great Barrier, about the construction of the Canadian Pacific Railway. Robert Christie made something of a career out of portraying Macdonald in those NFB films that I mentioned in reference to the Fathers of Confederation – he was in no less than five of them. Christopher Plummer played Macdonald in the 1979 miniseries Riel in a role that was more than a cameo but less than a full supporting part. Perhaps the best depiction of Macdonald was by the legendary William Hutt (who died just a few days ago) in the dramatization of Pierre Berton's The National Dream. Hutt's portrayal of MacDonald spans the period between 1871 (four years after Confederation when he was 56) and the completion of the railway in 1885 (at age 70, six years before his death). It is a tour de force performance, and for those of us outside of the reach of the Stratford Festival the first time we really saw him perform.

Alexander Mackenzie (1873-1878): The old Stone Mason, possibly the only "working man" ever to become Prime Minister (the rest have been lawyers or worse – civil servants) was the very definition of a "dour Scot". He's really only been depicted on screen once, again in The National Dream played by legendary Canadian character actor Gillie Fenwick, who I'm surprised to learn only passed away last year at the age of 90. Fenwick's portrayal is of a man who is a bulldog in opposition but once in power is labouring under the weight of the world.

Sir John Abbott (1891-1892): Following Macdonald's death Abbott, who was a member of the Canadian Senate at the time, reluctantly accepted the leadership of the Conservative Party and the job of Prime Minister. Although it is not clearly stated, there is a character named Abbott in The National Dream; unfortunately the actor playing the role isn't given screen credit or listed in IMDB entry for the mini-series. Interestingly, Christopher Plummer, who played MacDonald in Riel is the great-grandson of Sir John Abbott.

Sir John Thompson (1892-1894): The rising star of Macdonald's cabinet he was just about everyone's preferred choice to take over when Macdonald died but he refused until after Abbott resigned. He died of a heart attack at Windsor Castle within hours of being made a member of Queen Victoria's Privy Council. He's never been portrayed on film.

Sir Mackenzie Bowell (1894-1896): The senior cabinet minister at the time of Thompson's death he was an ineffective Prime Minister, and was removed by a cabinet revolt. Again, never portrayed on film.

Sir Charles Tupper (1896): The "Ram of Cumberland" was an incredibly able man who never really had a chance to show his abilities. He had the shortest time in office (68 days) was the oldest Prime Minister upon coming to power (74) and would be the oldest at the time of his death (96). In The National Dream Tupper is portrayed by Ted Follows as a fiery orator.

Sir Wilfrid Laurier (1896-1911): The man who said "The Twentieth Century belongs to Canada" was the first Prime Minster from Quebec and the first French Canadian Prime Minister. In the CBC and Radio Canada mini-series Laurier he was portrayed by the noted Quebecois actor Albert Millaire, who is also well known in English Canada. He may also have portrayed Laurier in The King Chronicle (see below) but maddeningly while both Laurier nor The King Chronicle have complete IMDB cast listings most of the actors do not have their roles stated.

Sir Robert Borden (1912-1920): Borden was Canada's first wartime leader (although Laurier who sent Canadian troops to the Boer War). He is almost certainly included in the Laurier mini-series but no actor is listed. He will apparently be portrayed by Francis X. McCarthy in the upcoming CBC mini-series The Great War, although this seems likely to be little more than a small part or possibly even a cameo.

Arthur Meighen (1920-21, 1926): Selected to replace Borden, one of Meighen's first acts was to call an election...which he lost. In 1926, when Mackenzie King's minority government was defeated, Lord Byng (the Governor-General of the day) called on Meighen as leader of the largest party in Parliament to form a government. King was able to rally the support of the third party in Parliament against Meighen and defeat his government. Meighen is almost certainly included in The King Chronicles but the IMDB listing for the miniseries is woefully lacking in details.

William Lyon Mackenzie King (1921-26, 1926-1930, 1935-1948): The first Canadian party leader selected at a political convention King's first term ended with a scandal over a tariff scandal (related to American Prohibition), while his second term was brought to a screeching halt by the Great Depression. His third term coincided with the easing of the Depression and the Second World War. His personal life was extremely eccentric; he was an enthusiastic participant in séances where he talked to – among others Laurier, his late mother, his various Irish Terriers (all named Pat), and Leanardo da Vinci. He also collected ruins on his estate Kingsmere. He was almost certainly included in the miniseries Laurier. In the miniseries about his life, The King Chronicles, he was portrayed by well known TV actor Sean McCann. He was played by Andy Jones in Prairie Giant: The Tommy Douglas Story.

Louis St. Laurent (1948-1956): Probably best known to the public as "Uncle Louis" he was in fact a brilliant lawyer and a great political mind even though he didn't enter politics until the age of 60. Although probably included in The King Chronicles he is "portrayed" in the TV movie Joey by David Ross (I say portrayed because this seems to have been a filmed stage play and Ross played eight different characters including St. Laurent).

John Diefenbaker (1956-1963): A brilliant trial attorney, Diefenbaker was the first western Canadian to become Prime Minister. A brilliant speaker, Diefenbaker was a poor Prime Minister. Diefenbaker is played by Robert Haley in the TV movie The Arrow where he is very much the villain. He was presented in a far more sympathetic light in Prairie Giant: The Tommy Douglas Story, in which he is played by Paul Gross (who played Benton Fraser in the series Due South with a dog named Diefenbaker). Perhaps the most interesting portrayal though is in Laurier where Joseph Levesque played Diefenbaker as a child. The story goes that during a campaign visit to Saskatoon, Sir Wilfrid bought a newspaper from a young newsboy across the street from the railway station and had an extended conversation with him that ended when the boy informed Laurier that he had to get back to selling his papers – the boy was John Diefenbaker, and in fact there is a statue of Laurier buying a paper from Diefenbaker on the site where it is supposed to have occurred.

Lester B. Pearson (1963-1968): One of Canada's greatest diplomats he won the Nobel Peace Prize for the creation of the first United Nations Peacekeeping Force following the 1956 Israel-Egypt War and the Suez Crisis. Pearson defeated Diefenbaker in 1963 but was never able to win a majority government. Pearson was portrayed by William Parsons in 2002's Trudeau and 2005's Trudeau II; Maverick In The Making.

Pierre Trudeau (1968-1979, 1980-1984): Regarded as perhaps the most flamboyant and charismatic of Canadian Prime Ministers ever, Trudeau entered politics as a cabinet member and within three years of being elected to the House of Commons for the first time was Prime Minster. A tremendous intellectual, he was regarded alternately as a "philosopher Prince" and arrogance personified (particularly in Western Canada). He was played by Jean l'Italien in the 1994 Quebec TV series Rene Levesque; and by Pierre Gendron in the 2005 mini-series Rene Levesque. In the 2002 mini-series Trudeau he was played by Colm Feore (who was born in Boston but has lived in Canada for the past 40 years). In the 2005 prequel Trudeau: Maverick In The Making he was played at various stages in his life by Dany Duval (1933-34), Tobie Pelletier (1938-1944), and Stephane Demers (1949-1968). Demers had previously portrayed Trudeau in the 2000 Quebec series Simonne et Chartrand. Finally, Yannick Bousquet provided the voice of Pierre Trudeau in the NFB documentary Trudeau's Other Children.

Joe Clark (1979-1980): At 40, he was the youngest Prime Minister in Canadian history. He had to deal with internal and external opposition to his leadership of the Progressive Conservatives. He made the mistake of trying to govern with a minority government as though he had a majority. By the time of his retirement in 2003 he was regarded as the most trusted politician in Canada. In the Trudeau mini-series he is only depicted using archival footage although a number of other living politicians are portrayed by actors.

John Turner (1984): The "Golden Boy" of the Liberal Party, he ran against Trudeau in 1968, finishing third. He spent seven years in Trudeau's cabinet as Justice Minister and Finance Minister before leaving politics in 1975 over conflicts with the Prime Minister. He returned to politics once Trudeau announced his intention to resign and won the Liberal leadership. Four days after being sworn in as Prime Minister he called an election despite being tarred with charges of patronage by his predecessor. His election campaign was, to say the least, filled with blunders. In the Trudeau mini-series he was portrayed by Karl Pruner.

Brian Mulroney (1984-1993): A smooth, fully bilingual Quebec attorney his term as Prime Minister started with such promise, winning the largest number of seats of any Conservative leader ever, reducing the Liberal Party to a rump of 40 seats. Things rapidly went down hill, and by the time he left office was referred to as "Lyin' Brian" and there was suspicion of massive corruption though nothing was ever proved. Never portrayed on TV.

Kim Campbell (1993): Canada's only female Prime Minister she was also the first woman to be Minister of Defence in any NATO country. Her only act as Prime Minister was to call an election due to the fact that Mulroney second term had lasted the maximum five years. Her brutal frankness and apparent condescension when dealing with "ordinary" Canadians, combined with the scandal ridden Mulroney term in office and an incredibly badly run campaign led to the greatest defeat of any governing party in Canadian history, with Campbell's Progressive Conservatives reduced to two members – and she wasn't one of them. Except for being portrayed by Luba Goy of Royal Canadian Air Farce has never been dramatised on TV.

Jean Chretien (1993-2003): If anyone understood the ordinary guy (or was assumed to) it was Jean Chretien. First elected to Parliament in 1963 he held a number of cabinet posts under Trudeau. He ran for Liberal leader against Turner in 1984 and resigned from Parliament in 1986 to protest Turner's leadership of the party. He was a generally strong and pragmatic politician whose reputation for honesty took a major hit in his last years in office. In the Trudeau miniseries he was portrayed by Guy Richer, and will be played by Gordon Tanner in the coming CTV mini-series Elijah about former Manitoba Native politician Elijah Harper.

Neither Paul Martin Jr. (2003-2006) nor Stephen Harper (2006-) have been portrayed on screen except in parodies such as The Royal Canadian Air Farce.

Happy Canada Day 1

Clearly the Flagston's are unaware that Ridgeville is in Canada and they aren't shooting off their fireworks to celebrate Independence Day but are celebrating Canada Day instead. Maybe Hi and Lois themselves are aware of it but are keeping the land of socialized medicine, cheap prescription drugs, gun control, and a drinking age of 19 (which is also when you can get into the strip bars if you live anywhere but Saskatchewan). They don't need to know that such evil exists!

Happy Canada Day to all of us lucky people who live in the land of socialized medicine, cheap prescription drugs, gun control, and a drinking age of 19.

Short Takes – June 26, 2007

Welcome back to your favourite NC-17 blog. Actually I think of that NC-17 in the same way that Gene Siskel and Roger Ebert regarded it when it replaced the X Rating. They hoped that the rating would be applied to films with artistic merit which also included adult themes but not to movies that were pornographic or "dirty". Mostly they wanted a rating that allowed deserving films to get newspaper and TV advertising because most theatres wouldn't book films that they couldn't promote. It didn't work out that way of course – NC-17 replaced X entirely, newspapers still refused to take the ads and films like most of Pedro Almadovar's work either wasn't shown in most North American cities or, once they figured things out, simply weren't submitted to the ratings boards at all. Anyway, I probably won't be using any of the words that got me the NC-17 for a while. Well okay, I'll probably use "dead" and "death" a bit. And I may use "enema," if only because it's sort of a silly word.

We`ll always have Paris: Which I guess is what I`m vaguely afraid of. I mean sure, I liked Paris Hilton in the Carl`s Jr. Ad, but what red-blooded North American male who didn`t have a stick permanently wedged up their backside (by which I of course mean the males in the PTC) didn`t. But mostly I`m like Evil Willow on Buffy The Vampire Slayer – "bored now." But they keep giving her to us. And sadly by "they" I don't just mean the tabloid TV shows and the stupid reality show. No it's now the mainstream news shows. ABC bids $100,000 to get the first interview with Hilton after she got out of the "Big House" after her harrowing 23 days in "Stir," but they get outbid by NBC, the network that piously proclaimed that that the story wasn't newsworthy. Or at least it wasn't until they could spin it in such a way that it was. NBC offered $1 million, and then when it became public knowledge and there were protests from the news division they not only withdrew the bid but proclaimed that the thing was only a rumour. So now we'll see Paris Hilton interviewed by Larry King – and presumably Larry's research staff will read any necessary books for him and provide him with questions that aren't too tough for either of them. CNN claims not to have spent any money to get this interview, and maybe they're even being honest about it, but setting aside whether Hilton got a sentence that other people in a similar situation – except for not being rich or "famous" – would have received (and there's plenty of evidence to suggest that she was treated differently by the judge because of her celebrity) what has she got to say that could possibly be worth a million dollars, a hundred thousand dollars, or whatever "consideration" CNN might be giving her. There is probably a story – even an hour-long news magazine report – on how the justice system treats celebrities (good and ill treatment alike) but this hype around Paris Hilton hasn't done anything like that.

(By the way, once upon a time I used to like Larry King. That was when he was the King – so to speak – of late night radio and operated out of Washington. He worked well with callers – except for anyone calling in to criticise Psychiatrists, who were immediately labelled Scientologists and cut off – and had interesting guests. These days, operating out of Los Angeles, he has his lips so firmly attached to the backsides of anyone in Hollywood that there are still some parts of the United States where he could be arrested for unlawful sexual activities. And he still doesn't read the damned books.)

Couric-watch: Which network has seen its evening news audience drop more since Katie Couric debuted as the host of the CBS Evening News. If you said "Well duh, that would be CBS," You would be, well duh, wrong (come on, you didn't think I'd post something like this if the answer was the obvious one did you). According the Nielsen ratings, as reported by TVNewser, the CBS Evening News with Katie Couric has lost 287,000 viewers from the same time last year. That's a drop of about 4%. The NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams has lost 533,000 viewers over the same period, a drop of 5%. It is almost twice as many viewers as CBS lost (185.71% to be exact) but then CBS obviously had a smaller audience to begin with. And while it can be argued whose fault that is, the one thing that is abundantly clear is that you can't blame Couric for having a smaller audience before she even arrived.

FOX – the clone network: A funny thing seems to happen when some networks come up with a reality or game show idea; FOX comes up with an idea that's almost exactly the same. Sometimes they even get it on before the network that came up with it in the first place. ABC brought Supernanny to American audiences, but FOX had Nanny 911 on the air three or four months earlier. ABC had Wife Swap; FOX came up with Trading Spouses and put it on the air before the ABC series. The similarities between the two shows were so great that ABC sued FOX for copyright infringement. And now Fox is doing it to NBC. One of the "highlights" of NBC's new fall line-up was a show called The Singing Bee in which contestants have to sing a song and remember the lyrics accurately after the music stops. The "bee" part comes in because the format is supposed to be like a Spelling Bee with eight people from the audience competing against each other. The show was supposed to start airing in the Fall, sharing a Friday time slot with 1 vs. 100. Except, FOX announced a new series called Don't Forget The Lyrics. In Don't Forget The Lyrics contestants have to sing the correct lyrics to songs of various genres. Oh there are "differences" – the FOX show doesn't use the Spelling Bee format. Instead a single contestant sings at various levels with the difficulty of the song increasing as the prize amount increases. So you can see, they're totally different shows. As I said, NBC planned to debut The Singing Bee in the Fall but when they got wind of FOX's plan to start Don't Forget The Lyrics on July 11 from 9:30 to 10 p.m. Eastern, that plan went out the window. NBC will debut The Singing Bee on July 10, with a second half hour episode appearing on – wait for it – July 11 from 8:30 to 9 p.m. Eastern; in other words an hour before the debut of Don't Forget The Lyrics. I love this, if only because if both of these shows suck as much as I anticipate (and to be honest devoutly hope) they may kill each other off before the start of the Fall season which will give 1 vs. 100 (a show that I really do like) a straight run.

Who does the PTC hate this week: Boy the stuff you miss when you skip a week. Before I get to that though, I want to remind all of you of the single issue on which I agree with the PTC, which is unbundling cable services and allowing consumers to choose which channels will be seen in their homes. This came up because Representatives Dan Lipinski (D, Illinois) and Jeff Fortenberry (R, Nebraska) introduced a new bill called the "Family and Consumer Choice Act of 2007" which would allow consumers to pick and pay for the channels they want. Of course the PTC and I totally disagree on why this should be done. I just don't want to pay for TV channels that I only see when I'm clicking through the channels to get to the shows I want to see. I don't particularly care for most music channels so why should I pay for Muchmusic, CMT, or MTV Canada. And if I save money by not watching those channels maybe I'll spend the money on other channels I want to watch but can't afford at present. The PTC on the other hand sees "pick and pay" as a way to punish the evil entertainment industry. Almost as soon the PTC's press announcement finishes praising Lipinski and Fortenberry (praise that consisted of most of the first paragraph) it spends eight paragraphs talking about the evils bestowed on the poor, innocent American public by cable and network TV (despite the fact that Lipinski and Fortenberry's bill probably wouldn't negate the FCC's "must carry" rules that were further strengthened by the US Supreme Court in 1997). Here's a little bit of the overheated rhetoric of PTC Governmental Affairs Director Dan Issett:

Last year, Congress acted to increase the maximum possible fine for violation of broadcast decency law, but the reaction from the entertainment industry was to file suit, claiming that the 'F-word' and 'S-word' were appropriate to air during prime time television, and that – of all things – a striptease in the middle of the Super Bowl was somehow not indecent. Clearly, the entertainment industry has lost its way, and is failing to live up to its legal obligation to broadcast in the public interest.

Last week, the U.S. Second Circuit Court of Appeals rendered a decision inexplicable to Americans families: that the 'F-word' and 'S-word' should be ok to be broadcast on the public airwaves at hours when tens of millions of children are in the audience. While we're a long way from the end of the judicial process in that case, and Congress may weigh in yet again, one thing is clear – if the entertainment industry really want to give parents 'complete control' of their televisions, as it says it does, then it would endorse the concept of cable choice.

And then there's his conclusion:

We commend Congressman Lipinski and Congressman Fortenberry for their excellent leadership on this critical issue, and we thank Chairman Martin for his thoughtful and forthright determination that parents must be given more and better tools to control the graphic sexual and violent content that comes into their homes. It takes real political fortitude to side with families and stand up to the millions of dollars the entertainment industry spends to buy influence in Washington. But make no mistake - the American people are grateful that this legislation is being offered today.

My viewpoint? If the vast majority of the "American people are grateful that this legislation is being offered today" it isn't because it will keep them from seeing the shows cited in the PTC's press announcement – Rescue Me from FX, South Park on Comedy Central, and the cleaned up version of The Sopranos that airs on A&E. It will be because it will save them money and maybe allow them to rid their TVs of multiple shopping channels and religious networks that they never watch. It is also a fact that the "American people" will vote with their pocket books and if the cable industry is smart – and there is absolutely no evidence to suggest that they aren't – they package their product in such a way as to make picking and paying for individual channels the least attractive option, and packages with a mixture of channels based around an apparent theme the most attractive. Those packages are what most people will buy.

I confess that one of the reasons why I look forward to Hell's Kitchen is because of the fulminating (a particularly appropriate verb for any pronouncement from the PTC – one always gets the impression that an over-abundance of righteous indignation on their part will lead to a massive explosion) they engage in when his show airs. Last week's Worst of the Week was no disappointment. The PTC had this to say of Ramsay (who "clearly plays the role of the Devil in Hell's Kitchen) and the show "What makes this show so bad for family viewing is that it is presented as "reality," when in reality no one would endure the Nazi-like persecution Chef Ramsey dishes out. In that sense, this show is unlike all other reality shows, as it tells young viewers that this type of behavior is what one can expect to encounter in life, and that obscene language, backstabbing, and vile personal attacks are acceptable in the workplace." Well setting aside the assertion that Gordon Ramsay is somehow Hitler-like, the fact is that Ramsay's own early training made Hell's Kitchen look like a stroll in the park. Marco Pierre White was notorious for his rages and bullying – indeed White's recent biography has a picture of Ramsay in tears after being screamed at by White making a mistake. Ramsay's behaviour in his working kitchens as depicted in the documentaries Boiling Point and Beyond Boiling Point is exactly as seen in the show. But perhaps the most telling proof that people will "endure the Nazi-like persecution Chef Ramsey dishes out" is that his restaurants have an astounding 85% retention rate for staff since 1993. (I'd ask Orac for the loan of the brain eating Hitler-zombie, but of course this is the PTC and the poor critter would starve looking for brains among that bunch.)

This week the PTC's Worst of the Week is the FOX series The Loop. This is a series that the network is burning off – airing the episodes during the summer – and doing so in a way that is reminiscent of a high powered industrial incinerator. FOX ordered episodes of this series as a midseason replacement after a brief run in the 2005-06 season but then changed their minds, first cutting the order from 13 to 10 episodes, then not running it at all during the main season, and finally running two or three episodes in a single night instead of one a week like even the weakest series being run in the summer. In other words it's business as usual for FOX where the network weasels are particularly obtuse. And yet the PTC treats it with far more respect than the network does, viewing it as "one of the crudest shows on television" terrible threat to the (non-existent) "Family Hour." The episode in question is called "The Window" (except that it isn't – the actual title is "Windows" which shows the usual PTC level of accuracy). The PTC quotes five "vulgar examples of sexual innuendo and dialogue from this week's episode," including "Sam: 'Did my package come?' Sully: 'No, but mine did.'" I'm not even sure I understand what that means out of context – and all of the quotes in question are out of context – let alone why I should regard it as vulgar. They finish their hatchet job review by saying "The Loop is has a simple formula: place the main character in a random conundrum, litter the script with taboo sexual dialogue and situations, and put it on the air in the family hour. The writers of this program show no regard for younger viewers or families who may be watching their program." I'm not going to defend this show as not being full of sexual innuendo; even though I haven't seen it I have seen reviews by people who have and either hate the sexual content and think that the show is getting what it deserves, or enjoy it and think that the network is treating it shamefully. But you know as well as I do that this series could air in any hour of primetime and the PTC would be condemning it as filth, all in the name of protecting the children.

Wow! I'm A Filth-Meister!

Who knew?

Mingle² - Online Dating

The rating is apparently based on the presence of the following words on the blog: Death (6 times), Dead (5 times), Suicide (4 times), Fuck (3 times), Fag (2 times), and Enema (1 time).

Let's see, Death and Dead I can discount - you can't write about TV these days without the words coming up, given the number of procedurals that are on the air. Suicide probably comes from defending Hidden Palms from the wrath of the PTC. I used the word fuck in the piece I did about the Second Circuit Court decision on "fleeting expletives" and at least one of those uses of the word came from a quote from FCC Chairman Kevin Martin. Oddly enough I only type the word fuck, I never say it. The two uses of the other "F" word came from a quote from a Blogcritics piece on the first season DVD of the mercifully recently cancelled The War At Home and was in my "Idiot Dad" Fathers Day post. For the life of me though I can't remember when I used the word enema in this blog recently.

AOL Polls About The Year In TV

Or is that the year on TV? Doesn’t really matter, I’m writing this post largely because I’ve been remiss about posting for most of the past week. I know it’s summer and all (as of Thursday) but I can usually find something television related to post about even in the summer. Trouble is that the last few days I’ve been running around quite a bit, and I get really tired – playing games late into the night (or maybe that should be early into the morning) doesn’t help matters a lot. Just today I had to ride up to the Co-op Home Center to pick up a sprinkler head to replace one I broke the other day (there’s a park on the route that I use which floods easily when we have heavy rains like we did a few days ago; two ducks seem to have taken up residence in the pond that was formed – one’s a drake but I think it’s a little late for ducklings). So anyway I have to resort to filler, and for a guy, what makes better filler than a list.

This poll was posted a few days ago by AOL, and TVSquad which is actually a subsidiary of AOL (or part of a subsidiary or something, suffice it to say that the relationship is sort of incestuous) had it on June 19. Jackie from The (TV) Show Must Go On posted her opinion yesterday so I figures I’d better get on the bandwagon. AOL Also had “Editor’s Picks” which no one else has mentioned so I’ll put those in here too, as well as my own opinions.

1. Best Drama – House (29%), Grey’s Anatomy (28%)

Editors’ Pick: The Sopranos (9%)

Me: Since I haven`t seen the final season of The Sopranos I don`t know that I can judge it fairly except to say that 9% seems way lower than it should be, but then Grey`s Anatomy`s percentage seems too high. Based on the shows I saw, I think House is the right choice.

2. Best Comedy – Ugly Betty (30%), The Office (28%), Two and a Half Men (26%)

Editors’ Pick: 30 Rock (7%)

Me: I almost never watch comedies anymore so no opinion. I`ve heard all kinds of good buzz about Ugly Betty though. The – to me – surprising support for Two and a Half Men is yet another reminder of how out of touch the PTC is with American taste. As for the Editors either they`re too hip for the room or as out of touch with America`s taste as the PTC. I say the former.

3. Best Reality Show – American Idol (39%), Dancing With The Stars (28%)

Editors’ Pick: Project Runway (8%)

Me: Okay, you know how much I love The Amazing Race but even I have to admit that there were some things that they did in the past two seasons that annoyed the crap out of me – a lot of them had to do with the selection of All Stars for the All Star Edition and some – well a lot – of the challenges. My pick is the same as Jackie`s, the one ignored by Viewers and Editors alike – Survivor: Fiji.

4. Best New Show – Heroes (38%), Ugly Betty (32%)

Editors’ Pick: Heroes

Me: Heroes is one of the shows that I lose thanks to bowling on Mondays. If I didn`t, it would be exactly the sort of show I would love, so only having seen a few episodes, I`ll make it unanimous.

5. Worst New Show – Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search For The Next Doll (56%)

Editors’ Pick: Happy Hour (9%)

Me: No and no. Absolutely no show could compare with Twenty Good Years in terms of maximum possible suckage. Horrendous is a generous assessment.

6. Best Season Ending Cliffhanger – Lost (32%), CSI (29%), Heroes (23%)

Editors’ Pick: Lost

Me: And again, no and no. I gave up on Lost this year thanks to the whole short season/long hiatus business, while the conclusion of Heroes seemed to me to be more of a conclusion to a season. CSI on the other hand was a show that I watched and which had a real cliffhanger: will Sara die under that car. Then again, when it comes to edge of your seat suspense how can you beat the ending of Jericho?

7. Best Villain – Ben (Lost – 28%), Sylar (Heroes – 26%), Tony (The Sopranos – 23%)

Editors’ Pick: Sylar

Me: I think the Editors got it right. Sylar is a guy who cuts people’s heads open and if the future that Hiro saw was accurate wanted to commit genocide. I can’t help but wonder if the people who chose Tony Soprano felt the same way last year.

8. Heroes Power You Wish You Had – Time Travel (28%), Healing (24%), Regeneration (24%).

Editors’ Pick: Precognition (6%)

Me: My comic book geek side remembers a character called Duplicate Boy who was Shrinking Violet’s boyfriend in the Legion of Superheroes. He had a power similar to Peter Petrelli’s namely duplicating the power of any other super-person. That’s the power I’d want.

9. Hottest Single Mom – Lorelai (Gilmore Girls – 33%), Hannah (October Road – 27%)

Editors’ Pick: Lorelai

Me: I admit that Lorelai is hot, but as you all know from my Mothers Day articles my allegiance in this goes to Catherine Willows on CSI.

10. Best Sanjaya Hairstyle – Pony-hawk (37%), Shirley Temple (28%)

Editors’ Pick: Pony-hawk

Me: Frankly my dear, I don’t give a damn.

11. Favourite Investigative Team – Benson & Stabler (Law & Order: SVU – 34%), Grissom & Sara (CSI – 32%)

Editors’ Pick: Keith & Veronica (Veronica Mars – 10%)

Me: Trouble is that they define a team as a pair. By that criterion my answer is Grissom & Sara. However widening things up a bit (a lot) it would have to be Gibbs, DiNozzo, David, and McGee on NCIS.

12. Couple You Loved To Love – Luke & Lorelai (Gilmore Girls – 32%), Carla & Turk (Scrubs – 24%), Sun & Jin (Lost – 22%)

Editors’ Pick: Eric & Tami (Friday Night Lights – 12%)

Me: The Editors got this one right. There’s a realism to the relationship between these two that we really don’t see that much on TV.

13. Couple You Love To Hate – Edi & Carlos (Desperate Housewives – 33%), George & Izzy (Grey’s Anatomy – 25%), Kate & Sawyer (Lost – 23%)

Editors’ Pick: George & Izzy

Me: I don’t hate George & Izzy, and strictly speaking I don’t hate Edi & Carlos – I don’t get it but I don’t hate it. No one picked Grissom & Sara on CSI, which is about as close to “hating” a relationship as I get. Grissom & Catherine = hot; Grissom & Sara not so much.

14. Most Shocking Development – Edie’s suicide (Desperate Housewives – 33%), Sanjaya’s survival (American Idol – 28%)

Editors’ Pick: Christopher’s death (The Sopranos – 15%).

Me: Close for me but I think I might side with the Editors on this one not just because of the death of such a pivotal character but because of who killed him and the way it was done. Besides, I’m laying odds that Edie’s suicide will have been caught in time for her to survive.

15. Most Disappointing Series – American Idol (30%), Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip (26%), Dirt (20%)

Editors’ Pick: Studio 60 On The Sunset Strip

Me: Tough one for me, but probably The Amazing Race. Even though I never reviewed Studio 60 I did like the show and if it disappointed me it was only because given that Aaron Sorkin created it I was expecting to love it the way I loved The West Wing, Sports Night, The American President and A Few Good Men and I didn’t. On the other hand I love The Amazing Race but found that the changes they made in this year’s two seasons took away from it, particularly the Intersection and the ability for one teams to take both Fast Forwards. Part of the problem can be traced to the hiring of the challenge creator for Survivor – I just don’t think he gets the sort of thing they do on The Amazing Race.

16. Coolest Guest Star – Jennifer Anniston (Dirt – 30%), George Takei (Heroes – 27%), Forrest Whittaker (ER – 24%)

Editors’ Pick: George Takei

Me: Definitely George Takei. Casting Anniston as Courtney Cox’s lesbian competitor (with whom Cox had a brief sexual fling years ago) was a stunt, complete with a kiss. Takei actually had a major presence in the series and the role shows that he has range. If Heroes actually manages to get any Emmy nominations, one of them should go to George.

17. Meanest Reality Judge – Simon Cowell (American Idol – 51%); Gordon Ramsay (Hell’s Kitchen – 36%)

Editors’ Pick: Len Goodman (Dancing With The Stars – 7%)

Me: Oh come on! Ramsay reduces grown men to tears and came close to inciting violence from some of his contestants. Admittedly the grown man was Aaron but still when was the last time Cowell or Goodman did either of those things.

18. Top Primetime Game Show – Deal Or No Deal (56%), Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader (33%)

Editors’ Pick: Deal Or No Deal

Me: Call me a game show snob, but I like game shows where the contestants are challenged with questions that range in difficulty but still don’t deliberately try to prove how stupid they are. There’s no skill to Deal Or No Deal. I prefer 1 vs. 100 because even though the questions aren’t all Jeopardy hard there is a challenge there, and not just for one person but for a group. And besides, Annie Duke was not only on the show but was the mob member who answered the most questions correctly, showing how smart the best poker players can be.

19. Strongest Network – ABC (36%), Fox (25%), NBC (18%), CBS (16%), The CW (5%)

Editors’ Pick: NBC

Me: How do you define strength? CBS tops the ratings and has a higher percentage of shows coming back than any of the other networks. ABC nearly killed Lost and went through a huge number of unsuccessful series – mostly sitcoms. NBC, which the Editors praised for adding 30 Rock, saving The Office, giving us Heroes and renewing Friday Night Lights also managed to ditch Kidnapped after a handful of episode, made a total mess of last summer’s upfronts (totally redoing the schedule within two weeks of announcing it), and firing the guy who renewed Friday Night Lights days after this season’s upfronts and only a couple of months after renewing his contract. This is a strong network?

20. Cancelled Show You’ll Miss the Most – Gilmore Girls (48%), Jericho (30%)

Editors’ Pick: Veronica Mars (13%)

Me: I rarely watched Gilmore Girls and only caught Veronica Mars when it briefly ran on one of the major networks a couple of years ago. The volume of response to the Nuts! campaign suggests that a lot of people were going to miss Jericho, and I would have been one of them.

So tell me (in comments), what do you think?