Showing posts with label Dancing With The Stars. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dancing With The Stars. Show all posts

Monday, March 09, 2009

Who Knew?

I mean seriously. Who'd have thought that you were more likely to get hurt on a show like Dancing With The Stars than on Survivor?

I think I've been pretty good in not writing about reality shows this year – this calendar year that is – and believe me it's been pretty hard. I mean there's a part of me that has been dying to express my opinion about "Coach" on Survivor (a real blowhard), how the group that Ramsay himself says is the best bunch of contestants ever to appear on Hell's Kitchen still can't cook the bleeping risotto, how the great challenges on The Amazing Race are exceeded only by the colourful locals – who frequently behave like they've been indulging in the local potables – who smile and laugh at the crazy Americans, or how one of my favourite poker players – Annie Duke – has so annoyed Joan Rivers (and therefore endeared herself to us all in the process) that Rivers compared her to Mussolini. But until now I've been holding off, holding my fire for the really bad reality shows that are going to be filling the summer schedule. (Okay, so I'm going to have to make an exception for Chopping Block. The host – Marco Pierre White – was Ramsay's first boss and made Gordon f'ing Ransay cry! And he has the pictures – in his autobiography – to prove it! How can you not write about that!!) Still I can't let the spate of injuries that have plagued the cast of Dancing With The Stars pass without some notice.

Let's face it. You'd expect people to get hurt on a "macho" show like Survivor. They're out there, isolated in the wilderness fending for themselves and then competing in those competitions where people are running and grabbing at each other, so obviously they must be getting hurt. What could happen on a "girly" show like Dancing With The Stars beyond the occasional blister on your heel thanks to an ill-fitting dancing pump?

Ah, but you would be wrong my friends. Looking at the list of serious dance related injuries – injuries that either involved broken bones, forced contestants (celebrities or pros) to leave the show before or during the competition or required them to have surgery after the show – on Dancing With The Stars and you come up with an interesting list:

  • Cristián de la Fuente – ruptured tendon in left bicep; kept dancing but needed surgery after show ended. Season 6.
  • Misty May-Treanor
    – ruptured Achilles Tendon during in rehearsal; forced to withdraw from show. Season 7.
  • Susan Lucci – apparently sprained ankle during rehearsal; in fact she had broken two bones in her right foot. Season 7.
  • Lance Bass – broken toe. Season 7.
  • Jewel – initially diagnosed with tendonitis, later discovered she had broken her tibias in both legs during practice; unable to dance. Season 8.
  • Nancy O'Dell – torn meniscus in one knee; surgery required. Season 8.
  • Karina Smirnoff – professional dancer, suffered neck injury requiring surgery. Season 6.

This doesn't include a number of other injuries that weren't serious enough to need surgery, illnesses, or events that injured participants outside of the context of the competition:

  • Li'l Romeo – injured his leg playing basketball; replaced by his father Master P. Season 2.
  • Marie Osmond – fainted while the judges were critiquing her during a live performance show. Season 5.
  • Jane Seymour – food poisoning resulted in her missing a results show. Season 5
  • Kristi Yamaguchi – injured ankle; did not affect her participation on the show. Season 6.
  • Kim Kardashian – cut her foot on a piece of broken mirror in her hotel room day before being named as a contestant; doctors okayed her to participate. Season 7.
  • Jeffrey Ross – suffered a scratched cornea in his left eye during rehearsals; didn't last long enough to know if it would have taken him out. Season 7
  • Brooke Burke – injured foot during camera blocking rehearsal. Season 7.
  • Maurice Greene – hyper-extended leg during rehearsal for group Paso Doble. Season 7.
  • Kym Johnson - professional dancer, hyper-extended leg during rehearsals. Season 3.
  • Mark Balas – professional dancer, dislocated shoulder during encore dance. Season 5.
  • Derek Hough – professional dancer, injured neck while rehearsing a routine for the results show; forced to miss that night's results show. Season 6.
  • Derek Hough – professional dancer, suffered food poisoning after drinking a protein shake. Season 6.
  • Karina Smirnoff – professional dancer, suffered left ankle sprain in rehearsals morning of performance. Season 7.
  • Derek Hough – professional dancer, blacked out after tripping and hitting his head. Taken to hospital but cleared to continue dancing. Season 7.
  • Julianne Hough – professional dancer, initially thought to be suffering a bad stomach ache, she was subsequently diagnosed with Endometriosis and was required to have surgery to remove her appendix; missed two weeks of dancing. Season 7.

Compare that with serious injuries on Survivor (same definition as for Dancing With The Stars):

  • Michael Skupin – fainted while attempting to start a fire and fell into the fire, suffering severe burns to his hands; evacuated from the show and had to have surgery. Season 2.
  • Jonathon Penner – suffered a puncture wound to his knee, which became infected; evacuated. Season 16.
  • James Clement – suffered an injury to his finger which the medical team monitored; when the risk of infection spreading to the joint of his finger was deemed too great he was evacuated. Season 16.

That's it. While seven people have either broken bones, been forced to withdraw or had to undergo surgery during their time on Dancing With The Stars as a direct result of events that took place on the show or in rehearsals for the show, only three people on Survivor have suffered injuries that were serious enough to get them taken off the show.

The big question is, "why is this happening?" The initial reaction was that the professional dancers were forcing their celebrity partners to practice too hard and for too many hours. According to the show's executive producer Conrad Green, speaking to People Magazine the truth may be quite the opposite: "This is now three fit women, if you include Misty May-Treanor from last season, who had to withdraw from the show. Perhaps people who are fitter throw themselves into it with more wild abandon. I really feel for them and we may need to take a look at [how hard people train] in the future." In other words it is the celebrities, and in particular the fittest of the celebrities, who are driving themselves to over-train for this competition.

There are other aspects at work however. Starting in the fourth season of the show, training time was reduced from six weeks to four. According to The Ballroom Dance Channel
blog the logical result of this is that with less time to learn the same number of steps and routines the celebrities – in particular the most competitive ones, who are often also the fittest – are going to drive themselves to do more, often at the risk of injury. The blog includes an interesting statement by amateur latin dancer and blogger Tonya Plank: "I mean, for the average serious beginner, you'd probably take two hours of intense private lessons per week, then about 10-15 hours of less intense, more social-dance-oriented group classes, and about three or four hours a week on your own. So, they are basically spending about a quarter of the time each day training that these DWTS competitors are." Plank also stated that to achieve the level that Dancing With The Stars wants from the celebrities – what's known as "Open Gold" level – usually takes two to four years for most people, and the celebrities on the show are required to achieve that sort of level in not one but two very different disciplines, which most dancers don't attempt.

Pro-am competitor Jerry Bowman explained his normal training routine involves 45 minute training sessions. There are two types of open –choreographed – competition. One of these involves groups and is what is normally seen on television. The other is a "showcase routine" which sounds very much like what is done on Dancing With The Stars: "This is danced with just you and the pro taking the whole floor and being judged on a graded scale with judges comments. This is a choreographed routine that usually has been put together for an exhibition show hosted by the local studio. It then gives an opportunity for the student and teacher to get feedback on the routine. Because these are done for an exhibition/recital type program and are usually more involved then about 20 sessions are used to prepare the routine." Bowman also mentioned that he personally usually spends as much time on his own practicing the routine, at least for the Open Routines (the group dances). He doesn't specifically mention the Showcase Routines, but assuming that he maintains the same routine for those that would mean roughly 30 hour in total spent training for a Showcase Routine, spread over a period of time. And he is an experienced dancer.

So what is the answer for Dancing With The Stars. While Conrad Green seems to suggest that limits should be imposed on the celebrities the editor at the Ballroom Dance Channel blog suggests that the answer might be to give participants more preparation time – at least in terms of the number of weeks that are available for them to work in – would certainly be helpful. In fact the two ideas could work together; an extended preparation period with limits on the total number of hours that could be spent preparing. On the othe hand this might work against the weaker competitors. I'm just guessing but I think that Steve Wozniak is in greater need of practice than Denise Richards or Ty Murray.

One thing is for sure, after the spate of injuries that Dancing With The Stars has had over the years the degree of fitness needed to do well on this show shouldn't be questioned. It's about more than fancy steps and hard-bodied women dressed a few strategically place feathers and sequins – though Lord know, the latter is why I watch!

Friday, May 09, 2008

Who Does The PTC Hate This Week – May 9, 2008

Wow! If I had known that I wasn't going to be posting for this long I'd have put up the Campbell's Soup Can (the universal sign of a blogger who was going to be away for a while). But of course I didn't know this was going to happen. Basically I just couldn't summon up the fire and desire to write anything. I was feeling Blogger's Block which combined with the time of the year – nearly the end of the regular season, no new "spackle shows" available courtesy of the strike, and the summer reality blitz not yet ready to roll. In short hardly anything to write about (or at least nothing that I really have been enthusiastic enough to write about) except the PTC, and to be honest I haven't been feeling that hot about writing about them. But they just keep getting outraged, and as we'll see when we get to the "Misrated" part of this post, it's sometime over the most absurd things.

Before we begin dissecting the outrage of the PTC at this week's supposed despicable acts carried out by the networks against the parents of America – which of course means the PTC itself since they have determined that they know what TV shows everyone in the United States, regardless of age, should be permitted watch hence their near constant outrage – let us spend a moment to snicker in their general direction. Why are we snickering at the PTC? Well, you might remember the PTC's outrage at the decision by CBS to repurpose the Showtime series Dexter to broadcast TV as a result of the Writers Strike. Apparently, regardless of the time slot the show was seen in, this action would expose America's children (or maybe the child-like American population regardless of age) to a show where a serial killer was the "hero." That was what they objected to but they were rallying the troops even before the show aired (and aired with considerable editing to eliminate things such as nudity and obscene language) to protest to the FCC over such a worthless program that would turn America's children (or America's child-like adult population) into seething serial killers, and they deployed a mass of "experts" ranging from an actual expert – quoted somewhat out of context – to a retired army officer who has created his own field of study ("killology") to prove that the show was going to turn America's children into slavering monsters. On April 2nd, the University of Georgia announced that Dexter had won a George Foster Peabody Award, which "recognize distinguished achievement and meritorious public service by TV and radio stations, networks, producing organizations, individuals and the World Wide Web." Not a word commenting on the award has come from the PTC. They are still trumpeting the commitment by NBC to the Family Hour – even while they're complaining about an NBC series airing in the Family Hour (but more on that later). All together now – >snicker snicker snicker<.

Given that it is shareholders meeting season it should come as no surprise that the PTC is making the effort to reach out to advertisers to request/demand that the advertisers adhere to the PTC's vision of good advertising conduct by not putting their commercials into show that the PTC hates. But what about the commercials themselves? Recently a PTC representative appeared at the Pfizer Pharmaceuticals shareholders meeting to complain about the company's ad for a certain little blue pill (Viagra). PTC Director of Corporate Relations Glen Erickson expressed the organization's views: "I'm sure you'll agree that parents need to monitor and control what their children are watching but your commercial advertising offers no indication as to where these spots will suddenly appear. Moreover, because of the sheer volume of advertising weight that Pfizer supports this particular brand with, it is virtually impossible for a parent to identify what shows will have kid safe commercials. Recently, your ads have appeared in NCAA basketball, ABC's World News and during shows on family-targeted networks such as TV Land and Discovery Channel. We understand that you are targeting men with your message but please appreciate that children are watching these programs as well. We receive e-mails, letters and phone calls on nearly a daily basis asking the PTC to address their concerns with you. Parents are feeling powerless and find themselves addressing personal parenting issues at a time and place that seem to be dictated by these ED ads. Your spots when viewed by children are at least confusing, if not upsetting and embarrassing, to all family members trying to watch TV together."

One thing that I noticed about this statement is just how different it is from the usual plea that comes from the PTC which usually takes the form of the PTC begging the company to abstain from advertising on those harmful programs and to tread the paths of righteousness – with the help and advice of the PTC of course. This statement isn't like that. It's almost deferential to the company. And apparently it worked because Pfizer officials agreed to meet with representatives of the PTC this month.

The problem of course is that "all" the PTC wants Pfizer to do is to stop advertising to its key markets. Think of it for a minute; who buys Viagra? Answer: men, and in particular older men (also adult film actors, but the PTC hates anyone and anything even tangentially linked to porn – for example any woman who ever stripped off for Playboy). The peak market for sports is men, and there is a major component of TV news viewership tends to be male, and – as poster on the Internet keep pointing out – older. How many pre-teens or teens watch Katie Couric. I can't comment on advertising on TVLand and The Discovery Channel, because we get different versions of those channels here in Canada (and Shaw Cable doesn't carry the Canadian version of TVLand anyway) but I can't help but note that the PTC has chosen not to mention when the "offensive" ads on those channels aired. Does this mean that I support Pfizer over the PTC? Well I wouldn't necessarily go that far – I find the ads for Viagra, and competitor Cialis, to generally be tastefully done – but I can see that they might lead to potentially embarrassing questions. And maybe that's what the PTC objects to most, embarrassing questions from curious kids.

Another "snicker" moment coming up for the PTC. You may recall that the Council embraced Ben Silverman's announcement about keeping the first hour of prime time more "family friendly" as a victory for the illusory "Family Hour" (illusory because it simply doesn't exist). You will also remember the feeling of surprise that they actually bought into it expressed not just be me but by others including Tom Jicha of the South Florida Sun-Sentinel who wrote that, "NBC Entertainment President Ben Silverman isn't a snake-oil salesman. He's someone a snake-oil salesman would be wary of. Silverman, as is his job, is trying to get any positive publicity he can for his struggling network." He specifically pointed at My Name Is Earl and 30 Rock as examples of shows that the PTC would find and has found not very "family friendly." Sure enough, less than two weeks after the press release praising Silverman and NBC, the PTC has released a new press release, condemning NBC for "its abrupt about-face, as evidenced by a number of recent graphic scenes during Family Hour broadcasts." The specific content they objected to came from My Name Is Earl and 30 Rock; in the case of the content from My Name Is Earl it came from an episode that aired the day before the initial press release. In the case of 30 Rock it was the April 10th episode which featured mentions (and probably some footage – I don't watch the show) from a fictional reality series called MILF Island. Here's what the PTC press release states, "According to PTC research, the episode of "30 Rock" showed mothers on "MILF" Island competing for the attention of 8th grade boys. (The term "MILF" is an acronym for 'Mothers I'd Like to F***.') When the mothers are eliminated from the competition, they must remove their bikini tops and throw them in a fire. The young boys are shown watching the women dance provocatively." Presumably PTC research means that someone from the organization turned on the TV and watched the episode, which also featured Tina Fey's character Liz Lemon roundly condemning the fictional show. In a letter to Silverman Tim Winter, president of the PTC wrote: "We were the first to praise NBC for returning to the Family Hour, but we must now be the first to condemn their apparent abandonment of the previous week's so-called commitment. We repeat our request to NBC: please make the Family Hour truly family-friendly. Responsible television programming is good business. NBC could easily return to its roots with successful shows that appeal to the whole family, such as The Cosby Show. Committing to families must be more than empty talk. We expect NBC to make good on its pledge to keep the Family Hour intact and fill it with programming that even children can watch."

In his letter to Silverman, Winter also wrote the following: "I understand that 'family' is a broad category and it includes families with small children, families with older children, and even families without children. But all too often material is called 'Family Programming' when in fact it is nothing of the sort. Ugly Betty comes to mind. The PTC has also recorded scenes from that program which implied oral sex, reference to genital size, pornography, strippers, anal sex, threesomes, kinky and fetishistic behavior, statutory rape, S&M and partial nudity. Foul language in Ugly Betty frequently includes words like 'suck', 'bitch', 'ass,' 'screw' and 'damn'. This is hardly 'family' quality material." I mention this because one of the executive producers of Ugly Betty was none other than Ben Silverman, before he became head of entertainment programming at NBC. Knowing the shows that were already airing in the "Family Hour" (that doesn't exist) and the track record as a producer of the man who made the supposed pledge to promote family friendly programming, what exactly did they really expect would happen? Was Silverman supposed to pull already produced episodes of two shows – one of which aired before he made "the announcement" because he made this pledge? For that matter why did the PTC believe that the man who was the Executive Producer of Ugly Betty – a show that the PTC loathes as much as it loathes My Name Is Earl – would share the same concept of what "Family Friendly" means that they do? For that at the very least we can surely muster a bit of a snicker at the naiveté of the PTC.

Remember when I said that the PTC gets outraged at the most absurd things as shown in the "Misrated" section of this post? Well, see what you think of this: they are objecting to the TV-PG rating for the April 7th episode of Dancing With The Stars! They think it isn't restrictive enough! So what happened? You may remember that Adam Corolla was a contestant this season. My brother, who loathes Dancing With The Stars thought he was the best one but that had a lot to do with him making a "farce" out of it. The PTC agrees with my brother, well except for that "best one" part. They write of Corolla, "Actor/comedian Adam Corolla, who has distinguished himself in the competition by making sleazy remarks at every opportunity, commented that he had been made to look more like a porn star than Zorro." In speaking with Tom Bergeron, following what turned out to be his last performance on the show (or possibly in the "confessional" sequence on the results show – the PTC doesn't offer access to this clip or maybe someone at ABC was smart and made them take it down) Corrola (according to the PTC) "thanked the wardrobe department for "dressing me like a silent porn star" to which his partner Julianne responded 'Oh (bleeped sh*t!)'" There; that's it; all of it. Adam Corrola said he thought he looked like a "silent porn star" and sweet little (Mormon) Julianne Hough said "shit" which the ABC standards and practices people were able to keep from being broadcast with a well placed "bleep." And if was a live sequence on the show that was even more impressive of them Well except for the PTC's explanation of the reasons why this show was misrated (though they don't actually say what it should be): "Such content is highly inappropriate for a program airing during the Family Hour, and which is one of the few programs left on prime time that parents could watch with their children. ABC's failure to rate this program appropriately stands as yet more evidence that the TV ratings system needs to be standardized – and taken seriously by the networks. Saying "porn star" which, no matter what the PTC thinks, are not bad words, and having a teenager (Julianne is 19) supposedly saying a word that was bleeped by the censors. And after all, TV-PG means Parental Guidance. I think the PTC is reaching way too far on this one people.

Finally, because this week's "Worst Of The Week" is yet another diatribe about Family Guy, which is getting to be incredibly boring to me – the diatribes not the show (which I don't watch) – we turn to the most recent TV Trends which confronts the evils of the demon Mari-ju-wana (that pronunciation seems appropriate, but for the life of me I can't remember who said it that way). More accurately, what the PTC sees as the "glorifying" of marijuana use in the media. Of course they don't blame TV entirely – they blame Harold And Kumar Go To White Castle: "With the exception of the Cheech & Chong movie series, prior to the mid-1990s, "stoner films" glorifying the use of marijuana were rare; but popular culture since that time has seen an explosion of pot-themed movies. This trend shows no signs of abating; indeed, the new movie Harold & Kumar Escape from Guantanamo Bay is set for release on Friday, April 25th. This film, a sequel to the 2004 picture Harold & Kumar Go to White Castle, will again enlist teen viewers' enthusiasm for the dope-smoking duo – an enthusiasm hyperbolically proclaimed on certain Internet sites." They actually go so far as to quote (severely edited of course) a comment posted on IMDB about the movie Harold & Kumar Escape from Gauntanamo Bay as proof (click the link to see the full quote, in context): "One Internet Movie Database commentator says that the movie's 'multicultural slackers' are 'American every-men that we can all relate to…incredible human characters who are struggling with real challenges around parents, romance, friendship, the law, and race.'" They then add their own commentary: "One wonders whether today's teens and young adults universally agree that two moronic potheads are the finest representatives of their generation; but regardless, this movie will join many others in displaying a casual attitude toward marijuana consumption, if not actually glorifying it." Setting aside for a moment the fact that nowhere in the original quote – or even the quote as edited by the PTC writer – does the commenter describe the characters as "the finest representatives of their generation," one can scarcely believe that "today's teens and young adults" would universally agree about anything. I mean there are still some who support George W. Bush!

But of course it is not the movies that the PTC objects to, it is TV. As they put it, "And where movies and other pop cultural phenomena tread, TV follows." The first example of rampant pot use they describe is That '70s Show about which they say, "That '70s Show, given its time-period setting and its obsession with the raciest and most counter-cultural elements of the era, made endless references to the use of marijuana." And of course that show is now widely syndicated. But That '70s Show isn't the target of the PTC's real anger – that would be Gossip Girl on The CW and My Name Is Earl on NBC. The PTC points out numerous – well one or two – examples of a casual attitude to marijuana use in the show: "However, the program has also multiple instances of teen drug use without any stigma attached to such behavior. On the September 19th episode, Chuck asks Nate if he wants to go get some "fresh air" and mimics smoking a marijuana joint. Blair pulls Nate away, causing him to tell Chuck he will smoke pot with him later. And in a later episode in the series, several teens are shown passing a joint around." They note a number of occasions where the show has specifically made reference and condemned the use of harder drugs by adults and states, "Such scenes demonstrate that drug use is a bad thing, and portrays teens as noble and virtuous for opposing the use of drugs by their parents," but later they note, "Gossip Girl rightly condemns parental use of drugs like cocaine, pointing out the tremendous harm drug use can cause – but then assumes that underage teens drinking and smoking marijuana is harmless and normal."

As for My Name Is Earl, they first stick in their normal bit of vendetta against the show for not being Touched By An Angel or Highway To Heaven – in other words for not focussing entirely on Earl doing good: "The latest example of the casual attitude towards marijuana use on television occurred on the April 17th episode of the formerly family-friendly but now louche NBC comedy My Name Is Earl. This program has gone to pot in more ways than one in recent seasons – but never more literally than in this episode..." Now setting aside the fact that I'm a "tell it to Sweeney" kind of guy who finds the use of the word "louche" to be pretentious beyond words, I find the PTC's "logic" in this strained beyond the bounds of sensibility. In the episode, which is a flashback, Earl's father burns a duffel bag full of marijuana that has been stashed in Earl's truck by a dealer (he thinks the truck is an abandoned wreck). Earl, Randy and their father have to try to replace the marijuana when the dealer comes looking for it. In the end, Earl's father feels happy about the experience because he's had the opportunity to protect his family. But here's what the PTC has to say about all of this: "But while throughout lip service is paid to the fact that marijuana is illegal, nevertheless it is shown to be a positive influence. At the end of the episode, Earl Sr. reveals that the dope-filled incident made him happy, because buying from the drug dealer gave him a chance to become a hero – with the result that, indirectly, marijuana was a beneficial presence in his life." Even the date on which the episode aired (and the second Harold & Kumar movie debuted) came under fire from the writer: "In addition to the many moments portraying marijuana use as comedic and not harmful, this episode offered an additional wink to the pro-marijuana crowd. Like the upcoming Harold & Kumar movie, the Earl episode was released as nearly as possible to the date April 20th – the number '420' being drug subculture code for marijuana use."

I'm not even going to dignify the My Name Is Earl stuff with a response since it is so patently absurd and moronic in its efforts to make connections. However something does need to be said about the other two shows mentioned. First of all, as someone who was in high school and university during the real 1970s (and didn't use marijuana, or even beer for that matter – on marijuana I'm on the side of "legalizing, regulating and taxing") I will still insist that any portrayal of teens in that period has to at least acknowledge the use of pot by teens. I knew guys who came to class stoned – although it should be said that when I was in high school here in Saskatoon booze was the drug of choice for my classmates who indulged. Pot was more common when I went to university. As for Gossip Girl, that is an even more obvious case of trying to depict a particular circumstance with at least a slight bit of reality. How can you present even a fictionalized version of modern high school life anywhere, let alone an upper class private school in New York, without depicting at least some of them using marijuana? The PTC statement says that the show "assumes that underage teens drinking and smoking marijuana is harmless and normal." I don't know about harmless, and I'm not even prepared to claim normal but what I will say is that it is more common than the PTC is willing to accept, and it isn't because TV or the movies have "glorified" it.

Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Okay Kids, It’s Over

I found this Blondie cartoon a few weeks ago and I've been saving it. Alexander and Cookie are obviously reacting to their parents cutting a rug in the same way that kids react when they discover Mom and Dad necking and realize that they are still probably still having sex. Of course in the case of Blondie and Dagwood, the strip was created back when the Foxtrot was the latest dance and the Tango had been popular since Valentino did it in Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse a few years before.

Fear not Cookie and Alexander, your parents will now stop behaving in this disgustingly unparental manner – the latest season of Dancing With The Stars has ended with the triumph of Apolo Anton Ohno and his professional partner Julianne Hough over Joey Fatone & Kym Johnson, and Laila Ali & Maksim Chmerkovskiy – announced at the end of a two hour finale that followed and hour long wind-up of The Bachelor.

So did the right people win? Not according to my mother! She was cheering for Laila Ali throughout the whole competition but then again she liked Billy Ray Cyrus (not as a dancer mind you but as a personality – I thought that Heather Mills and even John Ratzenberger were better than him). I liked Laila too but there were a couple of moments when the wheel came completely off. Number one was a couple of weeks ago when her dad was in the audience of the live show. Laila's strength was always a sort of sexy elegance epitomized by her performance in the Latin dances, but Muhammed Ali didn't like to see his daughter doing those sexy moves, so her performance was far more demure than in other weeks and the judges called her on it. The other time was when it counted, on semi-final Monday. Her freestyle performance totally lacked the elegance that the judges wanted to see from her and again they called her on it.

Both Joey and Apolo had stumbles in their semi-final performances, both during their "Judges Choice" dances. The choreography on both dances veered radically from the stylistic norms of the dance that the people were told to do. Their marks were reduced significantly. They made up for it on the Freestyle performances though. Apolo & Julianne put together a hip hop number that fitted their youth and which earned 10s from all three judges. Then if anything Joey & Kym out performed them with a dance that started with Joey leaping off the stage over Kym's head and landing on the stage and culminated with a sequence of lifts and spins that had judge Len Goodman saying that it was a shame that they could only give out 10s. It was showy and entertaining which was Joey's greatest strength.

The two hour finale on Tuesday night was more than a little anticlimactic when it came to judging. Each team was allowed to repeat one dance they had done from the previous episodes. Julianne & Apolo opted to perform their Pasa Doble a second time. It was one of two dances that the team had received a perfect score of 30 on – the other was a Samba in week 5 – and Apolo felt that it was his best dance. He earned a 30 on it the second time as well. On the other hand Joey & Kim decided to do the Tango they had done in the first week to the music from Star Wars. The movie is a favourite of Joey's and it was a dance they had done early in the season when he was unused to dancing. They earned a perfect 30 this time around with the biggest improvements being to his posture. Laila & Maks did a Mambo they had originally done in the second week of competition and they too earned a perfect score of 30. In other words the positions set on the first night hadn't changed in the second. The judges' votes, when combined with the votes of the viewers at home, which were cast after seeing only two of the dances, placed Laila Ali in third spot with Joey finishing in second

The two hour finale could have easily have been packaged as a 90 minute show without losing much of significance. There was a review of the history of the American Dancing With The Stars which acknowledged – albeit briefly – the show's origins as the British series Strictly Come Dancing but which implied that the series' international expansion was based almost entirely on the success of the American show when this was at the very least suspect if not mostly false. Previous results shows this season had been notable for the presence of several major musical acts and guest dancers. The series finale had the dancers eliminated in previous episodes doing samples of their dances, and given the length of time some of them had been off the show doing them even worse than they had when they were practicing every week. In short, even though there was considerable excitement as a result of the final results viewed objectively, the finale dragged more than a little. But of course in terms of ratings, that's isn't going to matter: the two episodes of the Dancing With The Stars finale are going to draw huge ratings, probably at least as good if not better than the ratings for the finale of Lost although probably not quite as good as the ratings for the finale of American Idol. It is ABC's big ratings winner of the year.

All of which leads to a final question from me. Dancing With The Stars appears in 32 different countries in addition to Britain (where it originated) and the United States. Greece, Lebanon, Thailand, Brazil, and Hong Kong are reported to be getting ready to do their own shows. One of the 32 countries is not Canada (or at least not English Canada – there's a show in Quebec called Le Match des etoiles which is similar to Dancing With The Stars in a number of ways but not a copy) and I guess my question is why CTV, which has adopted the Pop Idol/American Idol model with Canadian Idol – and done so quite successfully in terms of ratings and discovering talent – has not come up with a Canadian version of Dancing With The Stars? The show gives the network huge ratings (although apparently not huge enough for them to broadcast the finale live or in prime time – it aired here on Wednesday morning between 10 a.m. and Noon) and in the past we've seen Canadian specials for Who Wants To Be A Millionaire and Deal Or No Deal (on Global) so why not Dancing With The Stars – Canada?

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Why I'll Be Watching The Dancing With The Stars Finale
















Forget Emmitt Smith (right) and Mario Lopez (left), I'm watching this show because of their partners, Cheryl Burke and Karina Smirnoff. It's sort of like "Chick Flicks". Guys who "know" realise that you get the best nudity in "Chick Flicks." Guy films have nudity all right but it's usually one of the action heroes who's exposing his bits, as opposed to - you know - a woman. Well in Dancing With The Stars you have lithe athletic young women without a trace of excess body fat that I can detect, dressed in frequently revealing costumes shaking what their Mamas made them. And best of all, the Parents Television Council thinks it's all good clean fun. I'm glad they can't read my mind!

Friday, February 24, 2006

Too Much Bread, Not Enough Jam


So I admit that I have a fondness verging on addiction for Dancing With The Stars (to the point where I'd like to see a Canadian version) but like various Shakespearean heroes, the show has a fatal flaw. As the series goes on there are fewer performers and since the dances are physically taxing in terms of energy there is a brief period of time that the celebrity dancers in particular can go on before there are consequences - like falling or suffering a myocardial infarction. The net result is that the actual dancing part of the show takes less time each and every episode. Now in part they've combatted this by adding a second dance to the program for each team, but the problem continued. In last night's episode the problem came to a head in part because the programming weasels at ABC made a particularly stupid move.

The stupid move that the programming weasels made was to can Crumbs. Now as I understand it the "plan" is to put some sort of reality programming into the second hour of Thursday next week. And over the last two weeks they've shoehorned a repeat of Grey's Anatomy into the post Dancing With The Stars time by cutting Primetime back to a half hour. But they didn't have that luxury this Thursday so to fill the time slot, instead of burning off a final episode of Crumbs, they expanded Dancing With The Stars to two hours. The result? Well it wasn't pretty.

The tease at the start of the episode showed the celebrity dancers preparing for their performances for the night. Which is about all we saw of them live in that first hour. Most of the time was spent with Tom Bergeron - and to a lesser degree Samantha Harris reviewing the performances that the teams had done during the previous weeks. First we were "treated" to the best of Jerry & Anna then to Stacy & Tony and finally to Drew and Cheryl, all in considerable detail. We saw excerpts from all but one of the dances from each couple. After all they were going to be doing their favourite dance from previous weeks so it wouldn't be "helpful" for us to see how they'd done them before. We might compare them with what the teams did live and see faults and flaws - or at least differences - in the current performances. Interspersed between these taped highlights were taped highlights of the professional dancers doing routines that had been performed during previous one hours results show. The one hour results show was of course created once ABC decided that they could shelve Faith and Hope for a few weeks and no one would notice. And actually once they made up their minds that the results show would be live throughout what they had was not a bad product, with the emphasis on the potential music/variety format and the results of the dancing taking second place.

Now all of this occurred during the first excruciating hour of the final dance session. There was still an hour to go, which is the flaw in the whole procedure. The first hour was a waste of time - at least of my time since I could have used that hour to watch Survivor and not been forced to use my late feed to catch up. Beyond that it hurt the flow of the show. If the programming weasels were determined to have a two hour final dancing episode, they could have at least put the first dances for each team in the first hour, interspersed with the material on training, and staged the second Freestyle routines in the second hour. Or better yet they could have chopped the damned thing down to ninety minutes - as in previous weeks - which would have made the entire program tighter. Looking at professional routines could have been held of until the results show or just dumped all together. After all aren't we there to watch B or C class celebrities make fools of themselves by dancing?

By the way, just for the record, I think that Thursday night was the night that Stacy "not an elf" Kiebler lost the competition. Stacy & Tony's Jive was spectacular of course, but the whole house of cards collapsed with the Freestyle dance which literally looked as if it had been recycled from Saturday Night Fever and featured just one lift. It was a safe routine and consequently it was a capital "B" boring routine. The judges thought so to the point where they actually awarded higher marks to Jerry and Anna (in the most absurd Afro wigs ever) than to the "weapon of mass seduction". But the truly amazing performance came from Drew Lachey and Cheryl Burke who earned a second perfect score with their Passa Doble done to Michael Jackson's Thriller followed by a knock-out routine done to the song Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy that featured plenty of lifts and athleticism and earned them another perfect score of 30 from the three judges. More to the point it showed just how weak and safe the routine that Stacy and Tony put together was.

If I were to handicap this thing right now, I'd say that Drew and Cheryl are the likely winners, but given the way that the voting is set up it is entirely possible for any team - including Jerry and Anna - to win. What I can predict, with unerring certainty, is that the final results show of this season will again be an oversized extravaganza. It will, on the whole, be better than the two hours on Thursday night if they remember to focus on music and dance rather than building tension for the results - that can be done in half an hour or an hour - but in my opinion it will still be a bloated production compared to what it probably should be. An hour - fine; ninety minutes - pushing it; but two hours? Too little substance trying to cover too much time, or as I said above, "too much bread, not enough jam."

Friday, January 06, 2006

You Make Me Feel Like Dancin'

Okay I admit it. I should have been watching Four Kings or The Office or My Name Is Earl for review purposes but instead I was watching the second season debut of Dancing With The Stars instead. Yes they are, at best, B-List celebrities, and some of them I've never even heard of (in the case of Kenny Mayne it doesn't help that I'm a Canadian and the only time I see ESPN is at my brother's house on Sundays), and yes I did criticize it last summer, but you know what, it is fun and It does make me feel like dancing if only because I know that I'd be better at it than P Miller. And probably Kenny Mayne.

One thing that has to be said about this season of the show is that they seem to have learned from the mistakes they made last year, the big ones and the little ones. Overall the camera work seems much better. They didn't point a camera at one of the footlights which caused the resulting glare to washed out the screen to obscure the dancers, who were after all the focus of the event. That happened a number of times in the first season, and not just in the first episode. In this first episode the only major problem occurred when one of the hand held cameras crossed in front of the field fo view of one of the studio cameras. Moreover the director seems to have gotten the message that dancing isn't something you can adequately show from the waist up. You have to see the whole body and in particular the feet. More of the shots followed Fred Astaire's rule about filming dance, that you have to see the whole body in every dance sequence.

One major problem has been eliminated with the decision to run a half hour results program on Friday rather than having teams which have already been eliminated in the previous week's voting perform again the second week. A bigger problem for me is the decision to open the phone lines for voting at the beginning of the show before any of the performances have taken place. This just seems to invite the sort of voting which happened last summer. In my mind it is probably better to open the phone lines for a specific length of time after the show has aired. Of course, since this is entertainment rather than a "real" competition - no matter what the participants may want to believe - I suppose it's acceptable. On the other hand I think the ten team formula, which led to the show expanding to two hours this week and 90 minutes next week may be more of a problem. The show didn't seem to flow as well at two hours and it did bring them into opposition with CSI. I think the show would probably do better with a smaller number of contestants - say eight - and as a result a shorter premiere episode.

Another improvement was with the hosting. Last season Tom Bergeron was initially a terrible host. He seemed to regard the whole thing as a big joke and made atrocious jokes through most of the first couple of episodes until it became clear that the show was a big hit. In this first episode he hasn't been joking nearly as much about the experience. In fact he was playing it entirely straight while maintaining a jovial manner. Last summer Bergeron's backstage co-host was former Entertainment Tonight co-host Lisa Canning. Canning isn't back this season but has been replaced by Samantha Harris of E! News. I'm not sure that the change is for the better. The backstage host's job is basically to interview celebrities which was after all Lisa Canning's job at ET and Samantha just didn't seem quite as sharp as Lisa had been.

Of course what we all want to know know is "how was the dancing." Let's just say that it ranged from spectacular to worse than Evander Holyfield ... by several orders of magnitude. Admittedly there were reasons. George Hamilton said broke four ribs falling off a yacht. Tia Carerre had a baby three months ago and is struggling with losing the weight. The best excuse of all of course goes to Master P (also listed as P Miller) who replaced his son Romeo in the competition approximately a week ago. That said he gave the single worst performance of the night. He seemed to make very little attempt to work with the music and on the whole danced the Cha Cha like a traffic cone (male celebrities did the Cha Cha - female celebrities did the Waltz). The man made Evander Holyfield from last season look like a brilliant dancer. With two exceptions the rest of the male dancers were inferior to the female celebrities. George Hamilton - he of the magnificent tan - may have been restricted in some movements by his injury (and his age - 66) which but his dancing seemed to be restricted. He was a slightly more animated traffic cone, and the difference between him and Master P - and the reason why I voted for him - was that he at least seemed to be trying. ESPN's Kenny Mayne was the second male dancer to go and he seemed to combine an inherent lack of ability with a great enthusiasm that led him to be, well silly. At one point he literally waved off a move he was supposed to do when he realize he was out of synch with his partner, Andrea Hale. At other time he made somewhat discreet waves to the audience. But again, unlike Master P he tried. The best of the male contestants were Drew Lachey and Jerry Rice. It was certainly expected that Lachey would put in an excellent performance - he was a member of the boy band 98 Degrees (along with his brother Nick of course), is currently appearing on Broadway in Rent and is married to a choreographer. He didn't disappoint as he earned the top judges marks of 24. The big surprise of the men was former 49ers wide receiver Jerry Rice. Her partner, Russian born Anna Trebunskaya seemed dubious at first. She seemed to have no real understanding of American football and in an interview stated that "real men play hockey, or soccer ... or volleyball." On the dance floor however he had a fluidity of motion as well as a strength and most importantly and enthusiasm that was exciting to see. Lachey has a leg up with his previous experience but Rice certainly has a lot of potential as this competition goes on.

The majority of the female dancers tended to be better than the men. None received a score lower than 19. That went to Soap Talk host Lisa Rinna, who made a number of slight missteps through her performance . For all that, I thought that Tia Carrere turned in a satisfactory performance. Her movements were graceful but not particularly spectacular. Spectacular came from WWE wrestler Stacy Keibler who used her previous dance training and very long legs to considerable advantage. For all that her past training might come back to haunt her if the judges expect more from her because of it. Surprises were KTLA morning news personality Giselle Fernandez whose performance was excellent in terms of fluidity, and Tatum O'Neal. Tatum was giving something of a comic performance backstage, although how much of that was the producer's idea is a good question but when it came to the dancing she was spot on.

Dancing With The Stars was an improbable ratings hit last summer. I don't expect it to draw the sort of ratings this winter that it did in the summer particularly on a Thursday night. I think that ABC made a mistake in approaching the series as anything more than cotton candy in the summer. That said I watched it, and will probably watch it again next week, because it can get addictive. Sort of like cotton candy.

Monday, September 05, 2005

That Was The Summer That Was

Since just about everyone recognises Labour Day (or Labor Day) as the end of Summer, I thought it would be appropriate to have a look at what worked and what didn't in terms of summer programming, based on ratings and general feeling.

We Make Like The Donald But We Hate The Fakes: This summer season saw four shows based around the basic format of The Apprentice. Of those only the Gordon Ramsay series Hell's Kitchen on Fox had anything like ratings good enough to be deemed a hit, although the sometimes funny I Want To Be A Hilton (NBC) started reasonably well but it soon became apparent that Kathy Hilton's style had little ratings substance. The Cut on CBS, which featured Tommy Hilfiger started on Thursday, was moved to Wednesday by Big Brother and then was bumped to Fridays for some reason where it was taken of for at least one week thanks to pre-season football - and no one noticed! But the booby prize has to go to the David E. Kelly created reality show The Law Firm which featured "court cases" (really arbitration cases) which would have been laughed out of Judge Judy's TV court. It ran for two disastrous episodes before NBC decided it would be better off with reruns of Will & Grace and Scrubs and consigned The Law Firm to the dustbin of Bravo. What made Hell's Kitchenwork of course was that Gordon Ramsay was always right down there with the contestants, berating them and constantly being in their faces. On the whole however the performance of the faux Trumps was disappointing and should probably serve as a warning to Martha Stewart and her new show.

Now Fake American Idol We Like: Three series took the basic ideas behind American Idol and made them work: So You Think You Can Dance, Rock Star: INXS and Dancing With The Stars. All the elements are there: live performances, a jury of experts, and audience voting. They all drew at least good ratings, even Rock Star: INXS.

Controversy Is Fine As Long As It's Not Too Controversial: The summer season had ABC promising two controversial reality series. In Welcome to the Neighborhood we were promised a look at people who would have the opportunity to choose their new neighbours in an upper class area of Houston. In Brat Camp we had the chance to watch a group of troubled teenagers undergoing the rigours of an extreme camping experience to scare them straight. Brat Camp made it to air despite complaints from psychologists and critics who felt that the the whole thing was at best voyeuristic and at worst damaging to the future prospects for the unwilling participants. Welcome to the Neighborhood didn't even make it to air because not only did the Left complain about the notion of people getting to choose who they wanted living next to them, but the Right complained because they were certain that "Christians" would be portrayed as the bad guys.

We Wanted Bad Ass Kids Not Good Kids: The aforementioned Brat Camp featured a group of underachievers and disciplinary nightmares. It was one of the ratings successes of the summer. Meanwhile ABC also had a show called The Scholar in which a group of teens that any parent would be proud to call theirs competed to win a full-ride scholarship to the college of their choice. The Scholar started low and sank lower. That may in part be because the show was, well kind of dull, but it's still disappointing that Brat Camp did as well as it did. I liked the kids on The Scholar and was rooting for them, while I couldn't care less for any of the people (event he parents and counsellors) on Brat Camp.

If The British Like It, It Must Be Okay: Setting aside the shows based on American Idol for a moment, it seems as though series concepts imported from Britain were really working this summer. Brat Camp was originally a British series, while Gordon Ramsay did a show which was similar to Hell's Kitchen in Britain. Dancing With The Stars had it's roots in the British Strictly Come Dancing which also spawned series in Australia and New Zealand, while the British also did Hit Me Baby One More Time first. Of these the worst ratings performer was probably Hit Me Baby One More Time which had a strong start but faded over the next few weeks. The major attribute of these series was that they were the sort of ideas that hadn't really been seen on American TV of late, perhaps suggesting that U.S. TV is too blinkered and unwilling to try new ideas.

If It Was Any Good Why Did They Save It For Summer? By comparison viewers really didn't want new scripted program on network TV. Consider ABC's miniseries Empire and the Fox produced series The Inside (sorry, I can't tell you anything about Bad Girls except that it's on UPN - enough said). Empire which had the disadvantage of not being historically accurate as well as not very good finished second in it's debut episode but thereafter was third in a three horse race. More disappointing for me was the failure of Tim Minear's The Inside which I found fascinating. Unfortunately it ran into Dancing With The Stars and Brat Camp ... not to mention the executives at Fox. I don't know that it was born to die, because I think that on any other night it would have been successful. Unfortunately no one at Fox thought to try it on another night.

It Helps If Someone Knows Your Name: Consider the fate of two shows, Princes of Malibu and Tommy Lee Goes To College. Now setting aside the fact that David Foster and Linda Thompson had filed for divorce before this show actually aired (it only became known after the second episode aired) who knew the Foster-Thompson-Jenner menage before they got their own Osbornes clone? Now everybody knows Tommy Lee, if only as that tattooed freak who was divorced by Pam Anderson. Tommy Lee at college is a funny concept but would it have been as funny if we weren't aware of who he was?

Funny Is In The Eye Of The Beholder: I didn't particularly like the CBS series Fire Me Please, but it seemed to do reasonably well in terms of ratings, despite taking what was at best a half hour format and trying to run it for an hour. I thought that the show was at times inordinately cruel to the people who were being tricked by the people who wanted to be fired, but that's me. On the other hand I found the Ashton Kutcher "social experiment" Beauty And The Geekfunny and not particularly cruel at all. Maybe I just identified with the guys a bit too much. In terms of ratings, Fire Me Please had higher ratings than Beauty And The Geek but then again it wasn't on The WB and wasn't going up against a bunch of dancing celebrities. The WB liked the results well enough to renew Beauty And The Geek for another season.

We Like To Watch People Dancing. Who Knew? Biggest hit of the summer was Dancing With The Stars, a show where six 'C' List celebrities went ballroom dancing with six professional partners. It was fun and entertaining, and if some of the dancers weren't particularly good (like Evander Hollyfield, even if he showed a ton of charisma) well who cared. Everyone involved was having a ton of fun and that at least was obvious. So You Think You Can Dance? with its professional or talented amateur dancers hasn't been nearly as big a ratings success as Dancing With The Stars, but it has shown consistently strong ratings which win its time slot and is outperforming any new programming in the week including the veteran Big Brother.

And that was the summer that was. Bring on the new fall shows - PLEASE!!!!!

Sunday, July 10, 2005

A Sort-Of Apology

A few days ago I got the following e-missive. Although I have the name of the offended party I won't run it since I haven't contacted him and asked his permission. The guy (I will go that far - it was a man) wanted me to apologise for the piece I wrote on the first episode of Dancing With The Stars. Here's what he wrote (although I've replaced his quotation marks in keeping with the style I try to maintain in the Blog):

I'm awaiting your public apology relative to Dancing with the Stars. You thought you knew it all.

Well I'm not going to do it. True I was wrong when I said that Dancing With The Stars was a train wreck waiting to happen. But I refuse to apologise for expressing what at the time was my honest opinion.

Allow me to defend my position. The review was, on the whole not particularly negative to the show itself. The last line states "it at least has the advantage of originality" and while I did fault them on some technical gaffes - like the cameras shooting directly into bright lights which had the effect of totally obscuring the dancers - and for hiring Tom Bergeron as host (and giving him a pile of lame jokes), I did state that I found the premise intriguing. In fact I stated in my original review "Ballroom Dancing is a beautiful thing and even sensual thing when you're doing it ... and if there's a market for hours of figure skating in the winter, then there should be a market for this."

No, my problem wasn't with the show it was with the viewing public. The show was imported from Britain where Ballroom Dancing is a staple on TV, while it is hard to find Ballroom Dancing on TV even on a cable station in North America. Broadcast network coverage? Forget about it. Look at the British imports in the "nontraditional" programming areas that have appeared on network TV in the US and died: Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, The Weakest Link and the original concept of Big Brother (strictly speaking it debuted in the Netherlands but it was only when it hit in Britain that it came to the US) were all tried and for one reason or another failed in the US. This season's other British import in this style Hit Me Baby One More Time drew less than satisfactory ratings. My expectation for Dancing With The Stars was that North Americans wouldn't turn on the TV to watch it - that having expressed an enjoyment of people eating disgusting things (Fear Factor) Trying to find "Mr. Right" (The Bachelor), and scheming and backstabbing (too many shows to mention but including Survivor and The Apprentice and their clones), they would have neither the grounding nor the interest in watching people - even if they are semi-famous - dance in a formal style, because there wouldn't be enough "action". Thankfully I was wrong. It almost restores my faith in TV viewers. Almost.

The part of the email that really got me was that last sentence: "You thought you knew it all." Well no I didn't. I did what reviewers do, I stated my opinion. In my opinion the show was a train wreck waiting to happen because I didn't think it was going to get an audience. And incidentally I wasn't the only one. Although a Google News search didn't go back farther than June 6 here are some comments from professional reviewers.
  • The Mercury News: Take ABC's Dancing With the Stars (9 p.m. Wednesdays, Ch. 7) which made its debut last week. It's a ballroom dancing competition. (Well, that's OK.) It's a poorly executed version of a British hit. (Strike one.) It features such D-list celebrities as ex-``Bachelorette'' Trisha Sutter. (Strike two.) And it has a really lame host in Tom Bergeron from ``America's Funniest Home Videos.'' (Strike three, you're out.).
  • The San Francisco Chronicle's Tim Goodman: I also didn't review Dancing With the Stars on ABC because not just my life, but all lives, are too short to watch D-list celebrities dance.
  • The New York Daily News: Programs that premiered last week without benefit of preview, ABC's Dancing With the Stars and NBC's Hit Me Baby One More Time, provided too little context and even less entertainment value. Judges on the former tried too hard to be glib and quote-worthy (but failed), while watching the ravages of time do their work on formerly idolized rockers is more sadistic than heartwarming.
  • The Washington Post: Dancing With the Stars Inexplicably, about 13.5 million viewers watched the unveiling of ABC's dance competition starring C-list has-beens such as New Kids on the Block's Joey McIntyre, Rod Stewart's ex-model spouse Rachel Hunter, former world heavyweight boxing champ Evander Holyfield and professional reality-series star Trista Sutter.
  • Canoe.ca ( the online component of Canada's Sun newspapers): Forget the strange goings-on in the jungle on Lost, a more bizarre and mind-boggling mystery is emerging at ABC. No, it's not the network's new show Invasion or the latest script for Desperate Housewives - it's the unbelievable success of the ultra-cheesy ballroom dance-off show, Dancing With the Stars.
There are more if you're interested. By comparison I was gentle. They're all expressing their opinion. Could that opinion be wrong? Of course and I am willing to admit that my assessment of the ratings potential of Dancing With The Stars was off the mark. However nowhere have I ever said that what I've written while reviewing a TV show has been anything but my opinion, and I doubt that any critic ever has. So while I might apologise for not being perceptive enough to predict that the show would be a hit, I will not apologise for expressing the opinion that it wouldn't find a large audience.

Thursday, July 07, 2005

The End Of Two Sumer Shows

I hadn't planned on writing anything today but then I remember that Wednesday night represented the finales for two popular summer series - Beauty And The Geek and Dancing With The Stars - so I figured I might as well do a quick recap.

I actually don't have much to say about Beauty And The Geek. The final episode seemed to drag a bit because there was no final activities. The challenges in previous weeks had been a major factor in the enjoyment of the show and something was missing without them. That's not to say that there wasn't something of interest. We were finally able to see Richard in a situation where he wasn't acting the fool. He actually seemed to be a pretty good piano player. Had he been able to show this side of his personality earlier in the series he might have seemed less aggravating to everyone else - both in the mansion and amongst those watching. That's not to say that Richard wasn't good TV and you have to wonder just how much of what he was doing was the real guy and how much of it was playing to the cameras. Certainly it was the combative Richard/Chuck relationship that became the principal area of conflict in the series rather than the male/female relationships. So I suppose it was fitting that the two big "stars" - and their female partners - faced each other in the final episode. There was a tremendous conflict in styles. Away from the piano Richard was doing an exceptionally good imitation of the young Woody Allen (I'd previously compared Richard to the character of Urkel, but I think the Wood-man is closer to the mark), obsessing over everything that possibly could go wrong and what they should focus on for studying. Meanwhile Chuck - always controlled and disciplined thanks in part to meditation and martial arts training - took the attitude that what happens is what is meant to happen. And that's what basically occurred. The final elimination was tightly fought and literally came down to Richard not knowing what Mindy's middle name was while Chuck knew what Caitilin's was.

As for Dancing With The Stars, let me just say that it grew on me to the point where, if I currently had a special lady in my life, I'd probably be willing to head off to Arthur Murray's for some dance lessons which would probably go better than the ones I had before my high school graduation - although anything would have been better than that. The truth is however that John O'Hurley and Charlotte Jorgenson were robbed, in part by the judges and in part by the scoring system which gave as much weight to audience opinion as it did to judges scores. There was no possible way that Kelly Monaco and Alec Mazo's free-style dance routine was worth 10s across the board while John and Charlotte's was only worth 9s. Monaco's footwork was suspect in my view and she seemed to stumble at least once. The three point difference in the scores for the freestyle was enough to give Kelly and Alec a one point lead overall in the night's voting which meant 2 points from the judges while John and Charlotte got one. The audience voting last week apparently was stronger for Kelly and Alec - why, I don't know although it might be that she's younger or that she's on an ABC soap and thus more visible - than for John and Charlotte. However it may not have mattered. If the professional judges hadn't been so blind (or, if you're cynical, hadn't been told how to vote) and given John and Charlotte two votes and Kelly and Alec one, a tie would have resulted which apparently would have been settled based on the previous week's audience vote, so John and Charlotte were screwed either way.

Suggestions: Since The WB has already announced that Beauty And The Geek will be returning (much to my friend Ian J. Ball's disgust - see his Summer Update - 06/23/05) and since ABC is sure to renew Dancing with the Stars although they're not quite sure yet when they'll put it into the lineup, I should like to offer the following suggestions.

Beauty And The Geek: Geekier looking geeks. Richard really was the "geekiest" of the males although Joe had his moments. On the other hand the network should also look for women who are also more the way the website describes them - intellectually impaired. Just as an example, Scarlett - eliminated last week - may be a model and actress but she also had a college GPA of 3.4, a degree on business and is considering going for her MBA. The same held true of some of the other women.

Dancing With The Stars: More stars, less Bergeron. That guy really started to annoy me after a while and it wasn't a very long while. The British, Australian and New Zealand versions of the show had 10 teams which would make the initial dances shorter but would extend the series a few more weeks. Also, keep it in the summer. It may have been a big ratings grabber in the summer but I don't think it would have fared as well against new scripted programming. Finally and most importantly, fix the scoring! Audience participation is fine but it was a disaster in the final episode to have the audience vote count equally with the votes of the professional judges. Why not have each judge's vote count separately and the audience preference count for a quarter of the final total. After all theyknow what they're looking for. Oh yeah, and bring back O'Hurley and Jorgenson next year for another face-off with Monaco and Mazo.

Thursday, June 02, 2005

Well Apparently They Were

I thought that America wasn't ready for Dancing With The Stars and said so in my review. Apparently I was wrong, at least for the first episode. The overnight ratings are in and ABC scored an impressive (particularly for the summer) 10.6/16 rating with 13.23 million viewers. In the important 18-49 age group the show drew a rating of 4.2/12. This made it the highest rated show of the night. By contrast the show's lead-in, a Supernanny repeat, drew a 5.9/10 with 7.74 million viewers and an 18-49 rating of 2.4/6. The WB's Beauty and the Geek which was on opposite Supernanny had 3.5/6, 3.09 million viewers, and an 18-49 rating of 1.6/6 to finish 4th in the time slot.

Who knew?

Is America Ready For This?

Three new reality shows debuted tonight, two in the United States and one in Canada. Predictably I'm going to review the one which seems just slightly more innovative than the others - and also the one that I think will probably be the lowest rated, which in the summer of 2005 is saying a lot.

Every so often you come upon you come upon a train wreck. It may not have happened yet but you know it will. Dancing With The Stars is going to be a train wreck. I just don't know that the United States - or Canada for that matter - is ready for ballroom dancing on network TV, particularly when the dancing is done by people who have very little experience in ballroom dancing.

Ballroom dancing has achieved a new level of visibility recently. The 1996 Japanese movie Shall We Dansu? receive critical raves when it was eventually released in the United States, and was eventually remade last year as Shall We Dance? with Richard Gere, Susan Sarandon and Jennifer Lopez. ABC has describe Dancing With The Stars as an international sensation, and it is, although not always under that name. In Britain the series is known as Strictly Come Dancing and has featured UK media "stars" like comedian Julian Clary, David Dickinson (host of Bargain Hunt), and opera singer Leslie Garrett. The Australian version, also called Dancing With The Stars had veteran actor John Wood, Olympic Gold Medallist James Tomkins, and Home And Away Star Rebecca Cartwright, and there's a New Zealand version that's currently airing.

The show's format pairs a "star" with a professional ballroom dancer. Let's just say that some are more adept than others. In the US version of the show there are six teams (the British, Australian and New Zealand series had eight to ten). They are John O'Hurley (Seinfeld) with Charlote Jorgenson; four time Heavyweight Boxing champion Evander Holyfield with Edyta Sliwinska, Joey McIntyre (Boston Public and the band New Kids on the Block) with Ashley Delgrosso; Kelly Monaco (General Hospital) with Alec Mazo; supermodel Rachel Hunter with Jonathon Roberts; and reality star Trista (Rehn) Sutter (The Bachelor and Ryan & Trista Get Married) with Louis van Amstel.

The partners have had five weeks to work together to learn the various dance moves and to develop routines for each of 10 styles of dance. Following their training period the teams dance at a Los Angeles club in a live broadcast hosted by Tom Bergeron America's Funniest Home Videos. Here I think is part of the problem with the show. Instead of playing it straight, Bergeron decides to go for the cheap joke. Thus when talking about Rachel Hunter he mentions that even though shes a supermodel she "uses her powers for good." it's an old joke and it was a bad joke when it was new. I get the distinct feeling that Bergeron would rather be anywhere else. Fortunately Tom doesn't get to talk much, which is just as well because a little of him goes a long way. Then things go to the judges. The head judge is professional Ballroom Dancing Judge Len Goodman, who was also a judge on the British series Strictly Come Dancing and has been either dancing or judging dancing for most of his adult life. He's assisted by Hollywood choreographer Carol Ann Inaba, and Bruno Tonioli who was also on the British show and has worked with people like Elton John, Michael Jackson, Paul McCartney, Kate Winslet and Tina Turner. They each rate the dancers from 1 to 10 (Bergeron: "Which means that the tops score is thirty"). Finally viewers get a chance to vote American Idol style by phone or on-line.

The dancing was variable, ranging from slightly better than high school prom quality to not quite ready to enter a real competition. Teams had the choice of the Waltz or the Cha Cha Cha, and while no one truly embarrassed themselves in terms of screwing up, but a couple of these people shouldn't be allowed on a dance floor unless they're the ones getting married. Evander Hollyfield gave a particularly poor performance, mainly standing in place moving his arms and occasionally his feet while his partner Edyta moved around him. Allegedly he was doing the Cha Cha Cha. The dance that Rachel Hunter and Jonathon Roberts were doing was allegedly the Waltz, but it looked to ballet like for my definition of the Waltz. The worst judges' assessment waited for Kelly Monaco who was described as looking too stiff, "as if someone had died." The best dancers may have been the teams Joey McIntyre and Ashley Delgrosso and John O'Hurley and Charlotte Jorgenson (although I at least was impressed with Trista and Louis).

There were few if any problems with the live broadcast. There were a couple of times when Bergeron tried to talk over the crowd and the crowd won, and one incident where a camera literally lost a pair of dancers in the flare from a footlight, but those sort of things can almost be expected in a first broadcast. The judges were relatively mild in their assessments of the teams. There are no Simons in this group: the meanest comment was when Len said of some team: "A garden needs a mix of lawn and flowers. You were all lawn." It says something however that I can't remember which team he said it of.

I can see the appeal of Dancing With The Stars. Ballroom Dancing is a beautiful thing and even sensual thing when you're doing it (the dancing generations of the '50s and '60s have a lot to answer for), and if there's a market for hours of figure skating in the winter, then there should be a market for this. The trouble is that I don't know what that market is, and whether they'll be watching in sufficient numbers to give this show the ratings it would need to survive. The problem isn't that the people are "B" or even "C" list celebrities - on the whole television doesn't attract "A" list celebs at the best of times and this show isn't going to make a breakthrough in that area (well Robert Duval might be interested - he's a major fan of ballroom dancing to the point where he taught Waltz classes on the set of Lonesome Dove) - and loathe though I am to say it, the problem isn't Bergeron. The reason I don't expect the show to succeed is simply that it doesn't have the excitement and fire of an American Idol or the dramatic tension of a Survivor or even a Hell's Kitchen. Worse, despite the success of Shall We Dance? I don't believe there's as much interest in Ballroom Dancing in North America as there is in Britain and Australia. All of which saddens me slightly because unlike a show like The WB's Beauty And The Geek which also debuted Wednesday night (and which I'll review tomorrow after it re-airs) it at least has the advantage of originality.