Canadians Are Different–A TV Perspective

Care to guess what the most popular TV series in Canada most weeks is? Survivor? NCIS? American Idol? Big Bang Theory? Dancing With The Stars?
If you said any of those, you’d be wrong. The most popular TV series on Canadian TV most weeks is…The Amazing Race! Week after week and year after year The Amazing Race is among the top five series on Canadian TV and is usually in the top three. This illustrates a point: Canadians are different from Americans and illustrating this difference what is and isn’t popular on TV.

Allan Strachan of Postmedia did a survey of Canadian TV – or rather (as he describes them) the “Canadian mainstream broadcast networks” as the end of the TV season approached, giving shows letter grades based on the night and the ratings. Canadian ratings are based on live viewing an “Average Minute Audience” (AMA) The ratings they deal with are “live” audiences who watch the show as it’s broadcast  rather than Live-plus-seven, which would include PVR usage within a week of the show airing. There also doesn’t seem to be any differentiation based on demographics, at least not in the ratings that are available to the general public.

The most important thing to know about Canadian TV ratings is that anything over a million viewers is considered a hit and anything over two million is a huge hit. Anything over three million is the NHL playoffs – with a Canadian team. When you consider that Canada has a population of 34.5 million (according to the 2011 census) this means that a show that attracts over 3 million viewers is being watched by nearly 1/10th of the country. For a show in the US to have an equivalent audience it would have to draw 30 million viewers. Live.

In his article Strachan points out that ratings for the top shows are down from last year. He states that there are two possible explanations for this; either Canadians are watching less TV, or “as is looking more likely, consumers are watching TV in new ways, ways that don’t lend themselves to the traditional way of  measuring audiences.” These would include streaming video onto MP3 devices, or recording them on PVRs and watching them a day (or more) after they air – “so-called ‘live-plus-seven” ratings. There is a third alternative that he fails to acknowledge, namely that people are watching shows that aren’t available on the “Canadian mainstream broadcast networks,” including shows on specialty channels, on premium channels, and on “on-demand” services. There also doesn’t seem to be any differentiation based on demographics, at least not in the ratings that are available to the general public.

Strachan arranged all of the shows on Canadian primetime by day and then gave them a letter grade – A, B, C+, and D (with D really being an F). What I intend to do is look at the shows on a day by day basis, pointing out Strachan’s A and B shows, and also shows in the C+ and D range where there is a major discrepancy in popularity on one side of the border or the other. It is also worth noting that shows that air on the City system of stations tend to underperform. This is at least partly because the City system has broadcasting stations in five cities – Toronto, Winnipeg, Edmonton, Calgary, and Vancouver – plus three small affiliates in the interior of British Columbia, although they have recently entered into agreements to buy a station in Montreal and to acquire a cable presence in Saskatchewan.I’ll include notes for particular shows or situations. I’ll also include the Canadian AMA and ratings position where available and the US overall audience and position where available. These will be done with Canadian Ratings for the week ending May 6 (the most recent available to me) and the US ratings for the comparable period. There are thirty shows in the Canadian list from the BBM Canada and twenty-five in the US list form TV By The Numbers.

Monday

Show	Group	Canadian Network	Rank	AMA	US Network	Rank	Overall Viewers	Status
Hawaii Five-0	A	Global	9th	1,967,000	CBS	14th	10,909,000	Renewed
The Voice	A	CTV	29th	1,076,000	NBC	20th	9,515,000	Renewed
Dancing With The Stars	A	CTV	21st	1,318,000	ABC	3rd	16,200,000	Renewed
Two & A Half Men	A	CTV	12th	1,672,000	CBS	12th	11,321,000	Renewed
Mike & Molly	B	CTV	–	–	CBS	17th	10,162,000	Renewed
2 Broke Girls	B	City	–	–	CBS	23rd	9,237,000	Renewed
House	B	Global	10th	1,852,000	FOX	–	–	Ending
Bones	B	Global	11th	1,682,000	FOX	–	–	Renewed
Castle	B	CTV	13th	1,604,000	ABC	13th	11,081,000	Renewed

Notes: Two & A Half Men is listed in the Canadian ratings as airing on Tuesday night in the week ending April 29. Hawaii Five-0, Mike & Molly, 2 Broke Girls and Two & A Half Men. For the week ending April 15th, which is the period when Strachan did his research, Hawaii Five-0 finished 8th in Canada with an AMA of 1,821,000.

Tuesday

Show	Group	Canadian Network	Rank	AMA	US Network	Rank	Overall Viewers	Status
NCIS	A	Global	–	–	CBS	1st	17,583,000	Renewed
NCIS: LA	A	Global	4th	2,206,000	CBS	5th	15,212,000	Renewed
Glee	A	Global	16th	1,558,000	FOX	–	–	Renewed
Missing	A	CTV	15th	1,570,000	ABC	–	–	Cancelled
Rick Mercer Report	A	CBC	–	–	NA	NA	NA	NA
Unforgettable	B	CTV	22th	1,308,000	CBS	15th	10,658,000	Cancelled
22 Minutes	B	CBC	–	–	NA	NA	NA	NA
Whitney	B	CTV	–	–	NBC	–	–	Renewed
Hot In Cleveland	B	CTV	–	–	TVLand	NA	NA	Renewed

Notes: Both The Rick Mercer Report and 22 Minutes are Canadian made political satire shows and don’t air in the United States. Whitney was included in Strachan’s list because he was dealing with the whole year. It had ended its season in March. Hot In Cleveland’s US ratings aren’t included here because it is a cable series. Schedules for the two CBC shows are disrupted by the NHL playoffs. Missing aired in Canada on Tuesdays and on Thursdays in the United States.Finally, Strachan doesn’t include the Dancing With The Stars Results show in his breakdown. For the week ending April 29th the show finished 20th with an AMA of 1,190,000. This puts it three places ahead of the performance show with 11,000 more viewers!

Wednesday

Show	Group	Canadian Network	Rank	AMA	US Network	Rank	Overall Viewers	Status
Survivor	A	Global	5th	2,206,000	CBS	21st	9,428,000	Renewed
American Idol	A	CTV	8th	2,031,000	FOX	2nd	16,664,000	Unknown
Dragon’s Den	A	CBC	–	–	NA	NA	NA	Renewed
Criminal Minds	A	CTV	19th	1,370,000	CBS	11th	11,470,000	Renewed
CSI	A	CTV	6th	2,087,000	CBS	19th	9,749,000	Renewed
Republic of Doyle	B	CBC	–	–	NA	NA	NA	Renewed
Bomb Girls	B	Global	–	–	NA	NA	NA	Renewed
Revenge	D	City	–	–	ABC	–	–	Renewed

Notes: Bomb Girls was a short run dramatic series that has been renewed for a second season. Republic of Doyle is a CBC “dramedy”. Dragon’s Den is the Canadian version of the worldwide series that originated in Japan. It debuted before the American Shark Tank which has the same format (and two of the same investors on their panels – Kevin O’Leary and Robert Herjavec, both Canadians). I included Revenge to illustrate the effect of a show being on the City TV system. It is one of the breakout hits of the 2011-12 season but the show doesn’t have an audience on Canadian TV because it’s on City.

Thursday

Show	Group	Canadian Network	Rank	AMA	US Network	Rank	Overall Viewers	Status
Big Bang Theory	A	CTV	1st	3,232,000	CBS	6th	13,908,000	Renewed
Grey’s Anatomy	A	CTV	3rd	2,266,000	ABC	24th	9,237,000	Renewed
The Mentalist	B	CTV	7th	2,050,000	CBS	9th	12,944,000	Renewed
Touch	B	Global	–	–	FOX	–	–	Renewed
Person Of Interest	C	City	–	–	CBS	8th	13,270,000	Renewed

Notes: Person of Interest is included as further proof of what I call the “City Effect.”

Friday

Show	Group	Canadian Network	Rank	AMA	US Network	Rank	Overall Viewers	Status
Blue Bloods	A	CTV	17th	1,519,000	CBS	16th	10,356,000	Renewed
Marketplace	B	CBC	–	–	NA	NA	NA	Renewed
CSI: New York	B	CTV	–	–	CBS	–	–	Renewed
Grimm	B	CTV	26th	1,094,000	NBC	–	–	Renewed
the fifth estate	B	CBC	–	–	NA	NA	NA	Renewed
Undercover Boss	B	CTV	–	–	CBS	–	–	Renewed
The Finder	B	Global	–	–	FOX	–	–	Cancelled

Notes: Marketplace is a national consumer affairs show that will be going into its 40th season in 2012-13. the fifth estate is a newsmagazine series that will be going into its 38th season. The two shows are currently off the air due to the Stanley Cup playoffs.

Saturday

Show	Group	Canadian Network	Rank	AMA	US Network	Rank	Overall Viewers	Status
Hockey Night in Canada	A	CBC	20th	1,358,000	NA	NA	NA	Renewed
Celebrity Apprentice	D	Global	–	–	NBC	–	–	–

Notes: The ratings stated here for Hockey Night In Canada are actually the cumulative ratings for CBC’s second round playoff coverage, which was on six of the seven nights in the ratings period. Celebrity Apprentice airs six days after it airs on NBC. Strachan states that the show struggles to reach 300,000 viewers most weeks. Strachan understands that the delay of almost a week in airing the show contributes to the low ratings, but also states that “the numbers suggest hardly anyone in Canada watches NBC on a Sunday night.”

Sunday

Show	Group	Canadian Network	Rank	AMA	US Network	Rank	Overall Viewers	Status
Amazing Race	A	CTV	2nd	2,602,000	CBS	22nd	9,404,000	Renewed
Once Upon A Time	B	CTV	14th	1,601,000	ABC	–	–	Renewed
Heartland	B	CBC	–	–	NA	NA	NA	Renewed
Desperate House-wives	B	CTV	–	–	ABC	25th	9,223,000	Ending
GCB	B	CTV	30th	1,046,000	ABC	–	–	Cancelled
The Good Wife	B	Global	–	–	CBS	–	–	Renewed
CSI: Miami	B	CTV	–	–	CBS	–	–	Cancelled

Notes: Heartland is a Canadian drama.

Edited to include up to date information.

The New Season – A Status Report

I saw something interesting at Marc Berman’s page at TV Media Insights on Thursday. Apparently of twenty seven series that debuted this fall, thirteen of them have been given a full season order. Several other shows have been cancelled. Now the thing is that – if I’m not mistaken – November sweeps began on either Wednesday or Thursday, meaning that these thirteen seasons have been renewed before sweeps. Regardless of that I thought it might be of interest to look at the status of the shows from the 2011-12 shows.

ABC

Last Man Standing – Full season order
Man Up – Status pending
Suburgatory – Full season order
Revenge – Full season order
Charlie’s Angels – Cancelled after nine episodes
Once Upon A Time – Full season order
Pan Am – Status pending. The network has ordered five additional scripts

CBS

2 Broke Girls – Full season order
Unforgettable – Full season order
How To Be A Gentleman – Effectively cancelled after three episodes
Person Of Interest – Full season order
A Gifted Man – Status pending

FOX

Terra Nova – First season will end in December after 13 episodes. No information on renewal expected until May 2012
New Girl – Full season order
I Hate My Teenaged Daughter – Debuts November 30, 2011
X-Factor – First season will end on December 22, 2011. Has been renewed for a second season
Allen Gregory – Status pending. Will be replaced by Napoleon Dynamite after 13 episodes

NBC

Playboy Club – Cancelled after three episodes
Up All Night – Full season order
Free Agents – Cancelled after four episodes
Whitney – Full season order. Will move to Wednesday nights (replacing Free Agents) from Thursdays when 30 Rock returns to Thursday night
Prime Suspect – Status pending
Grimm – Status pending

The CW

Hart Of Dixie – Full season order – 1.7/3
Ringer – Full season order – 1.4/2
H8R – Cancelled after 2 episodes, will be replaced by One Tree Hill January 11, 2012
The Secret Circle – Full season order

Here are the overall audience (in Millions), overall position, rating in the 18-49 demographic and position in the demographic for each of these shows in their last airing. Shows that have a full season order or will be ending at mid-season are in red.

Network	Show	Overall	Position	Demo	Position
Sunday
ABC	Once Upon A Time	11.64	3	3.9/9	2
ABC	Pan Am	5.59	3	1.9/5	3
FOX	Allen Gregory	4.73	4	2.4/6	4
Monday
CBS	2 Broke Girls	11.14	2	4.2/12	1
FOX	Terra Nova	6.38	3	2.1/6	3
The CW	Hart Of Dixie	1.97	5	0.6/2	5
Tuesday
ABC	Last Man Standing	9.30	2	2.6/8	3
ABC	Man Up	6.41	4	1.8/5	4
CBS	Unforgettable	11.27	1	2.3/6	1
FOX	New Girl	7.53	3	3.5/9	1
The CW	Ringer	1.80	5	0.8/2	5
Wednesday
ABC	Suburgatory	8.49	3	3.1/8	3
ABC	Revenge	8.57	2	3.0/8	1
FOX	X-Factor	11.50	2	3.9/10	1
NBC	Up All Night	4.75	4	1.8/5	4
Thursday
CBS	Person of Interest	11.66	1	2.7/7	3
NBC	Whitney	4.33	4	2.1/5	4
NBC	Prime Suspect	4.47	3	1.2/3	3
The CW	The Secret Circle	2.27	5	0.9/2	5
Friday
CBS	A Gifted Man	8.39	1	1.2/4	2t
NBC	Grimm	5.92	2	1.8/5	1

The Difference Between Canadians And Americans

As I have often noted here, I am a Canadian. And Canadians are different from Americans. One place where this is apparent is in what we watch on TV. Oh, it's not Canadian shows that we watch on TV – for the most part Canadian shows don't penetrate onto the Top 20 list of most watched shows – but what interests us is quite different from what catches the hearts and minds of Americans. Following is a list of the Top 20 shows In the United States for the 2009-10 Television season, based on Total Average Viewers per Episode, with their position in Canada and the average number of viewers in Canada for the same show. (For American Idol and Dancing With The Stars I am assuming that the more highly watched shows are the Performance Shows and the lower rated versions are the Results Shows). For comparison a general rule of thumb is that the Canadian population is 10% of the US population, but that is a rough estimate.

Position	United States	Viewers	Canada	Canadian Viewers
1	American Idol	24,714,000	4	2,789,000
2	American Idol	23,461,000	5	2,686,000
3	Dancing With The Stars	19,725,000	11	2,172,000
4	Sunday Night Football	18,782,000
5	NCIS	18,699,000	10	2,201,000
6	Undercover Boss	17,732,000
7	The Mentalist	16,828,000	9	2,279,000
8	CSI	15,820.000	15	2,084,000
9	NCIS: Los Angeles	15,667,000	20	1,768,000
10	Dancing With The Stars	15,298,000	14	2,092,000
11	Two And A Half Men	14,825,000	16	2,032,000
12	Big Bang Theory	14,224,000	12	2,169,000
13	Desperate Housewives	14,058,000	17	1,933,000
14	Survivor Heroes vs Villains	13,669,000	1	2,929,000
15	Criminal Minds	13,552,000	3	2,807,000
16	Grey's Anatomy	13,552,000	2	2,899,000
17	Survivor Samoa	13,450,000	1	2,929,000
18	60 Minutes	13,269,000
19	The Good Wife	12,617,000
20	CSI: Miami	12,617,000	13	2,125,000

Rounding out the list of the most popular shows in Canada are:

Position	Show	Viewers
6	Amazing Race 15 & 16	2,529,000
7	House	2,493,000
8	CSI: New York	2,349,000
18	Lie To Me	1,811,000
19	Hockey Night In Canada	1,796,000

Of the most popular shows in Canada, only Hockey Night In Canada is a Canadian produced show. Undercover Boss and 60 Minutes don't air in Canada while Sunday Night Football is seen on TSN, one of the cable sports networks, meaning the The Good Wife is the only show not in the top 20 in Canada that is seen on a major network (Global) in this country. Also, in Canada both seasons of Survivor (Samoa and Heroes vs Villains) were lumped together as one.

I'm not entirely sure what to make of the differences. Three of the six top rated shows in Canada are reality-competition series as opposed to five of the top six in the United States (and yes, I am stretching the definition of reality-competition to include Football – it is a competition and it is reality) but we seem to like different reality-competition series than Americans. Of the top five shows in the United States only two are in the top five in Canada, and they do significantly (in Canadian terms) less well than two scripted shows that don't penetrate the top 10 in the United States. I could say that Canadians might like our shows to be a bit deeper intellectually – I think you could argue that shows like Criminal Minds, House, and Lie To Me are just a little bit deeper than some of the shows that are on the top 20 in the Unites States. That would fit our love of The Amazing Race which has placed in the top 10 in Canada since the show started but which has long struggled in the US market. But that's probably not the real explanation. After all, that doesn't explain Grey's Anatomy. So while I acknowledge that there is some sort of palpable difference between what Americans and Canadians watch, I'm sure why that difference exists.

Wow! I'm A Filth-Meister!

Who knew?

Mingle² - Online Dating

The rating is apparently based on the presence of the following words on the blog: Death (6 times), Dead (5 times), Suicide (4 times), Fuck (3 times), Fag (2 times), and Enema (1 time).

Let's see, Death and Dead I can discount - you can't write about TV these days without the words coming up, given the number of procedurals that are on the air. Suicide probably comes from defending Hidden Palms from the wrath of the PTC. I used the word fuck in the piece I did about the Second Circuit Court decision on "fleeting expletives" and at least one of those uses of the word came from a quote from FCC Chairman Kevin Martin. Oddly enough I only type the word fuck, I never say it. The two uses of the other "F" word came from a quote from a Blogcritics piece on the first season DVD of the mercifully recently cancelled The War At Home and was in my "Idiot Dad" Fathers Day post. For the life of me though I can't remember when I used the word enema in this blog recently.

Short Takes – April 30, 2007

Last week I had planned on writing one of these Short Takes pieces, in part because the PTC's "Worst show of the week" article on 24 last week tossed in a reference to the Virginia Tech shootings that was at once so self-serving, and so incidental to the piece that it was almost a non sequitur that I was livid. Then I remembered the old advice to newsgroup writers about posting when you're angry and decided not to write about it. The problem is that this is so typical of the PTC's behaviour that expecting them not to mention it would have been like expecting the scorpion not to sting the frog. The problem for me was that they didn't address the issue head on with facts and figures or even anecdotal evidence. Instead they just tacked a sentence – "In light of the tragic events at Virginia Tech, it is deplorable that young people with impressionable minds could view such programming and fantasize about the use of weaponry in such a violent manner" – onto a piece that had been written before the events at Virginia Tech occurred about something that had absolutely no connection with those events.

Now let's go on to current events.

Another Tim Minear series bites the dust: I swear I don't know why Tim Minear or any of the Buffy/Angel team keeps working for Fox. Or at least keeps doing shows for the FOX Television Network. Consider his record. The first series he did as a producer was the syndicated High Tide: it ran three years. Next was Strange World which ran 13 episodes on Sci-Fi. Then came Angel, which was on The WB for five seasons. Then came the series that he did for FOX: Firefly (14 episodes aired – eventually), Wonderfalls (14 episodes shot, 4 aired), The Inside (14 episodes shot, 7 aired), Standoff (consulting producer on 4 episodes). To that you can add Drive – 6 episodes shot, 4 aired.

I haven't seen Drive. I swear I was going to review it but forgot to turn on the VCR for the two hour premiere, did tape the third episode (on my bowling night so I couldn't see it live). I wasn't sure I could get into the show without having seen the first two episodes (the premiere) and after I saw the ratings for Monday's show on the Programming Insider section of the Media Week website I pretty much knew that this series was drawing dead as we say in Poker. I still have what turned out to be the last two episodes on tape and I may actually watch them to see if the show was worth saving. It seems at times as though Miner creates shows just so Fox can cancel them. I didn't see Wonderfalls and I wasn't impressed with a non-Miner episode of Standoff but I was a big fan of Firefly (it's one of the few series I own on DVD) and was quite impressed with the interplay of characters on The Inside – a series that Fox brought Miner in to salvage.

The cancellation of Drive seems to be symptomatic of this entire television season on all networks, not just FOX. According to Ed Bark, Drive is the ninth series this season to be cancelled after five episodes or less (he counts Celebrity Duets as a tenth show but it was meant to only go five episodes). In addition he lists eight other shows that got at least six episodes before being pulled. Of the 17 shows he mentions in his article five were on Fox – six if you count Celebrity Duets – and five on ABC. NBC had three, CBS had two and The CW one. Eight of the 17 could be described as serials or shows with a heavy reliance on continuity. The whole thing has reached a certain level of self fulfilling prophecy from a viewer's standpoint. Some people are taping or TiVoing shows for fear of getting involved in something that will get cancelled – they'll catch up with the show if it stays in the line-up – but even with the new Nielsen ratings system which counts recorded shows if they are watched within a week of being recorded, the fact that they are waiting to see if the show becomes successful enough to stay on the schedule for as long as 13 weeks means reduced viewership (lower ratings) which means that cancellation is more likely. In other words "I won't watch it now in case it gets cancelled, but it gets cancelled because people aren't watching it." It seems to be a vicious circle.

Alec Baldwin wants to leave 30 Rock: Baldwin announced that he wanted to get out of his contract on NBC's 30 Rock shortly after the infamous voicemail message to his daughter. His stated reason is that "he does not want to bring bad press to the show." NBC has rejected the request, which is probably best for all involved. My feeling is that after a certain amount of time for the controversy to cool off he would have regretted taking this sort of action at the spur of the moment. His comments in the voicemail to his daughter were harsh but everyone has had moments like this caused by anger and frustration; his just "happened" to be made public. My real anger isn't with him it is with whoever leaked this to the media. Given the bitterness of his custody battle with ex-wife Kim Bassinger it isn't hard to think of who that might have been.

Rosie O'Donnell is leaving The View: Rosie is one of those people who polarize opinion. Some people love her, other people loath her. Last week Rosie announced that she would not be returning to The View once her current contract ends. Donald Trump immediately told everyone who could be bothered to listen – which was surprisingly more people than just his four children and his Melanija – that Barbara Walters had finally wised up and fired the "fat slob" (Trump had called her that when their original feud broke out). Apparently the truth was far more business related, and concerned the length of her contract with the show's producers ABC. Rosie wanted a one year contract, which would give her greater flexibility, while ABC wanted her to sign a three year contract. In other words, contrary to what "The Donald" believed, ABC (and presumably Barbara Walters) wanted her to stay on the show and for a longer period of time than Rosie herself was willing to commit to. It's no secret why ABC wanted Rosie to stay on the show – ratings for The View have increased significantly since O'Donnell replaced Meredith Viera.

Who does the PTC hate this week?: Oh it's a long and distinguished list of both likes and dislikes. Let's start with the likes.

First there's the National Religious Broadcasters for coming around to support the concept of cable choice "the only way to enable them to be truly in control of the television content coming into their homes." They also cite support from something called the Free Congress Research and Education Foundation. I had to look that one up but it's about what you think it is. According to their own description the Foundation is a Conservative think tank but a socially conservative think tank: "Most think tanks talk about tax rates or the environment or welfare policy and occasionally we do also. But our main focus is on the Culture War. Will America return to the culture that made it great, our traditional, Judeo-Christian, Western culture? Or will we continue the long slide into the cultural and moral decay of political correctness? If we do, America, once the greatest nation on earth, will become no less than a third world country." As for the NRB, Chris Hedges, writing in Harper's Magazine on May 30, 2005, described it as one of the leading groups of the Dominionist movement (defined by Wikipedia as "the notion that Christians owe it to God to exercise God's dominion in secular society is asserted, by means of '[taking] control of a sinful secular society.'") I'll leave those two except to say that "by their friends shall ye know them" (which is an overused quote but it fits). The PTC adds "Families should not be forced to subsidize cable networks that air indecent, profane or graphically violent material. Families are counting on religious broadcasters and other pro-family organizations to continue to lend support for cable choice." Somehow it seems more likely to me that many of the first cable channels cut will be the religious channels.

The PTC is also very happy about the FCC report on TV violence – although not enough to provide a link to the FCC report or even to quote from it. Mostly the PTC is too busy quoting itself:

• The PTC found that violence on prime time broadcast television has increased 75% since 1998. The television season that began in the fall of 2005 was also one of the most violent ever recorded by the PTC.
  
• Upon review of prime time broadcast programming from 1995 to 2001, the PTC found 110 scenes of torture. From 2002 to 2005, the number increased to 624 scenes of torture.
  
• The TV ratings system is still not accurate, and thus grossly unreliable, due to the fact that content descriptors are being arbitrarily and inconsistently applied by the broadcast networks during prime time viewing hours. This means that parents cannot rely on blocking technology to protect their children from inappropriate content.
  

"We desperately hope that this report will achieve what has heretofore been fruitless: To motivate the industry to step up to the plate, take responsibility for its product, and fix a problem that it has not only created but perpetuated. And make no mistake about it: the industry has the ability to fix it. The question is whether it will do so." They then go off on a tangent on every issue that the PTC disagrees with the networks about from the "arbitrary, inaccurate, and entirely self-serving" rating system to the decision by the networks to file suit (actually I believe it's an appeal) in the Federal Court "to use the F-word in front of children."

On the other hand the PTC hates General Electric. It's ironic that the organization that wants to censor television programming itself is complaining about censorship. The PTC was engaged in one of its usual diatribes at the GE shareholder's meeting. PTC Director of Corporate and Government Affairs Don Isett was calling on GE, parent company of NBC, to "stop producing, promoting and broadcasting programs that contain some of the most graphic violence, excessive sexual content and foul language on television." A transcript of Isett's statement is found at the site linked. It began "I am here today because NBC consistently promotes and produces programming that contains graphic violence, excessive sexual content and foul language and we think this needs to stop – now." It includes references to the increase in violence (by 635% in the 10 p.m. hour between 1998 to 2005-06 – 2 incidents per hour in 1998, 15 in 2005-06), profanity (he cited the "dick in a box" sketch on SNL; the PTC applauds the bleeping of 16 uses of "a vulgar slang term for penis" but decries the decision of NBC to put the uncensored version onto its website), and NBC's assertion of its legal right to sue in federal court "demanding the right to air the F-word in front of children watching broadcast television." His statement was cut off after he delivered what reads to me like a concluding statement: "Chairman Immelt, GE can and should deliver the scale of a great company to solve big needs around the world and can act as a good citizen by making sure that its impact transcends the bottom line. Those words should sound familiar to you as they are the GE corporate policy on community. Please, now more than ever, NBC needs your help; the proud history of NBC demands no less."

Finally, the PTC's worst show of the week is the episode of Thank God You're Here featuring actress (and first rate Poker player) Shannon Elizabeth. The PTC starts by taking a shot at Shannon's career: "This week featured Shannon Elizabeth, best known for her role in the sex charged teen comedy movie American Pie. It can be argued that Ms. Elizabeth's career has been driven by her nude scene in American Pie and by her reputation for playing promiscuous women." Only then do they go onto the actual content of the show. She participated in two sketches, one solo and one with the other people on the episode, Tom Green, George Takei, and Chelsea Handler. The PTC seems most upset about her individual sketch in which she plays an advertising copywriter. "Traveling quickly down an improvisational road to indecency, Elizabeth pitches an idea for vodka for children. At the conclusion of her skit she is given a bottle of vodka, pepper, and a banana to show the client her new concept for how to drink the beverage. Elizabeth inserts the banana into the male client's mouth and proceeds to insert the other end in her mouth, blatantly mimicking oral sex." Let's start by mentioning that the idea of vodka for children was actually suggested by actors in the scene who are working from a script. The excerpt on the PTC's site (which is not available on Firefox) doesn't actually show the "infamous" banana scene (which "climaxes" – so to speak – when she bites the tip off the banana), but again it is the scripted actors who provide the banana prop. As for Shannon Elizabeth's other scene, the group scene features a Viking leader trying to select his successor. The PTC objects to the way that Shannon "proves" why she should replace the king. "Shannon Elizabeth wastes no time and simply begins kissing the king deeply as the crowd cheers. This sparks a kissing spree as Ms. Elizabeth proceeds to kiss the judge and other cast members. A kissing orgy erupts and the cast all begin kissing each other. The display clearly crossed the line of friendly affection and was absolutely a sexual spectacle. " They finish up with this claim "It should also be noted that the rating for his episode was a mere TV-PG, proving once again that the ratings system is a sham in its efforts to protect our children. For its irresponsible depiction of sexual promiscuity and heavy sexual innuendo, Thank God You're Here is our pick for Worst of the Week." Sexual innuendo I get based on the banana scene, but surely there have been worse depictions of sexual promiscuity. And remember the "PG" in TV-PG stands for "Parental Guidance." The blocking software allows parents to keep their kids from seeing any TV-PG show the rating of which implies that there is material that parents might not want their younger children seeing and which they should be diligent in watching with their children. If you object to something that you see in a show like this, change the channel or turn the damned TV off.

And just to give you a sense of what we're talking about, here in its entirety is the Viking Sketch from the April 18^th episode of Thank God You're Here. I think it's funny.